So here is a topic close to my heart, as you all know.
I would like to start a discussion amongst all of you shrew-folks about being married to a sheep. How are you handling it? What sorts of issues are you encountering? What do you do to keep the peace? Have any of you left your partners or are thinking of doing so?
This is not only open to those of us hitched up with the fuzzy adorables, but also open to those of you who are married or partnered with the shrew persuasion (or maybe the most sane of the bunch, those who are single!!) Do you have any words of wisdom for us? Any solutions? Ideas? Tricks?
Lets get this shrew/sheepfest going here. We need all the help we can get!!
I can honestly say that I only have sheep leaning family members, not my spouse (Thank you Jesus). The only friends I have left AC that were friends BC are shrews that became so at different times and speeds but have arrived in pretty much the same space as I'm in. I find it very hard to make small talk at the best of times so "pretending/self-censoring to get along" is just too much for me. As one person I met AC says, cut the branch off, it's not going to heal. If someone were to reach out to me and sincerely want to know how I am that might work, but even BC most people only asked how you are as a greeting not a true question. So I guess I'm not that helpful. I think had my husband not been willing to look at the hard truth with me, we'd be divorced now. When you know, you know.
You’re welcome, Todd. I’m glad you’ll check it out - there are some amazing folks in the group and dedicated to supporting each other through these times and still be in service to others in a deeply meaningful way. N Carolina has more shrews than you might think! I have been active in helping develop a community of “awarelings” (my word for us) and we now number about 50 in this rural, mountain area and meet monthly or more for over 2 years!
Hi Todd - I have been following your substack for awhile and very much appreciate your perspective on our current situation. I’m a psychologist living rurally in the NC Mountains and felt befuddled and alone when the narrative re:C19 rolled out in 2020 and not a single local colleague in my field saw through the psy ops. I wanted to make you aware of a support group for those of us who are shrews in the field called Differently Aware Psychological Therapists. It is out of the UK and meets weekly on Fridays. It is an international group and it’s free. They host an occasional introductory workshop via EventBrite for new folks. The next is on September 15. They also have a telegram channel. They do vett all newcomers to make sure they are who they claim to be. I can give more information and the link to the EventBrite event if you’re interested. I shed shrew tears of joy the first time I connected with these folks from UK, Australia, NZ, Crete, Germany (too many countries to mention) and realized we are everywhere!
If you go to EventBrite and search for events under “Differently Aware Psychological Therapists” you will see the introductory support workshop event on September 15. You can register for free. They will vett you, however, to make sure you are who you say you are.
This is wonderful information...thank you so much for bringing this to my attention. I will definitely check it out...
Yeah, I would suspect that NC would be mostly sheep...one of my previously best friends...a REALLY close friend, lives in Clemson...the Carolina to the south of you. I grew up in Virginia...so I know a bit about the old south.
It is important for me to say and be clear, my wife is an amazing human being. I love her dearly, she is kind, sweet, incredibly intelligent….I could go on and on. But alas, she IS “sheeplike”….since I know her well, maybe she doesn’t fall into all of the nuances of being a sheep. I do know she believes in the narrative. She believes in being a good citizen, and doing what you are told (although she pays little attention to speed limits on the freeway.)
I am dedicated to her…and will be with her as long as she will be with me…but that is the very thing that worries me…her beliefs do not bother me, not enough to not be tolerant and patient, but I am afraid that MY beliefs bother her much more than I would think they should…there’s the rub. But who knows…again, when the shit REALLY hits the fan…who knows. For now I do trust that her intelligence will come through and she will take care of herself…
But who knows…it doesn’t seem like that is what is happening with most people…
I’m not really sure how I feel reading all this; a bit ill, actually, because it brings startling reality to the fact that I have settled with living a facade among and placating the sheep in my life. I feel outwardly that I am the one out of place; the odd duck, the weirdo. I feel I’ve been dropped into the wrong movie. Everyone else just wants to live in La-La land, not rocking the boat, pretending everything is peachy. I want to scream so many times daily, “ How can you be so fucking blind, so pathetically complacent? Why doesn’t any of this matter to you?!” And yet, I’m sure they feel as helpless as I do. What’s the point of talking about something we can’t effect?
Even my conservative friends don’t want to talk about it. Instead they focus on the cute antics of their grandchildren. Grandchildren I know we’re leaving to the wolves. But I end up being the pariah for mentioning anything, ever, at all. I can’t be me, I can’t express my true feelings. I have to go along with the meaningless surface drivel about absolutely nothing important.
My semi-sheep, closet conservative, partner is French Canadian and does not ever want conflict, (is this a normal trait among the FCs?) especially with his super-sheep family members. Again, I’m the outsider and he cautions me constantly about saying anything about the news. Even though he watches the controversial stations, he knows I read voraciously and I believe he knows I’m knowledgeable and right about much of what I try to tell him that the infotainment want address, but I see that he rolls his eyes and tries to change the subject most times I try to discuss topics in more depth. He’s a conservative when it comes to his business activities, but I really consider him a RINO; he would never stand up for conservative principles for fear of looking bad in front of others. It’s all about preserving his image among those with whom he wants to fit in with. I see this attitude as indicative of the sad shape we’re in in this country, overall. There are no revolutionaries who will stand and fight to preserve our freedoms today; they all assume someone else will do the dirty work and save their butts when it all hits the fan. They don’t want to stick out, be labeled “right-wing” or MAGA. It’s depressing and most days I feel emotionally and physically defeated. I find little joy in life amidst all the pathetic apathy. I feel like I’m just going through the motions of a fake life. I feel I’m simply living out a sentence until I’m either thrown in jail or shot for my my beliefs. And perhaps that would be a relief. It would end the play-acting. No one really cares anymore. They just want to go to cocktails and dinner and chit chat about nothing. Like everything’s fine. For now.
I can’t get excited about traveling as I’m terrified a plane will fall out of the sky when a pilot strokes out in the flight deck. I don’t want the hassle of traveling abroad and running into the vax-passport Gestapo due to some recently changed border rule. It’s just really taken all the wind from my sails. I feel like I’m treading water. I can’t un-know what I know. I can’t just let it all go and live in ignorant bliss. I’m drawn into reading more; it’s addictive. I know I’m clinically and chronically depressed but all the therapists seem to be liberals or at least have to adhere to the mainstream dogma of rainbows and Unicorns . I don’t know how to find my joy anymore. What’s there to be joyful about? I know cognitively that God will reign supreme in the end but I’m not sure I’m cut out for the continuous bullshit and struggle until that day of reckoning. I don’t tolerate stupidity and incompetence well. I’m constantly amazed at how truly disengaged in life people are. I know I should love the sheep as Jesus would and shine his light of truth on the world, but my batteries are depleted. I want to subscribe to “we’re all one as God’s children” but I just don’t think I can take much more. I must be an alien; from a distant planet that doesn’t fit in this game board. Am I the only one? Hoping sleep silences the frustration for awhile.
Gord lord Cyn...you took all those words out of my mouth. I am continually astonished, and relieved, so many people are sharing the exact same thing...how fascinating...down to the minute details. I guess it proves we are all made of the same stuff...
Aug 7, 2023·edited Aug 7, 2023Liked by Todd Hayen, PhD, RP
I sympathize and felt somewhat the same way. But there IS joy. Being alive is a joy. And I truly believe that fighting the fight is THE reason to live right now. And to be grateful that we are alive right now to fight the fight. If you don't feel the joy anymore, give it a shot to start speaking your mind to all the sheep, all the RINOs, all the people who you have been required to tiptoe around. When you want to say something, but hold yourself back, stop, say to yourself, "dammit, I'm SAYING it", and then spit it out in a calm, reasonable (like you are talking to children) way, smile, and say, "as any rational, thinking person would agree". I think you will feel the yoke of depression fall off your shoulders. Trust me, it worked for me. Because the REAL test is to see who remains your friend/ally/lover/partner. The people who TRULY care about you will be remaining, the ones who don't will leave. And as sad as you think that will be, and it WILL feel like a sucker punch, you will feel freed - because you will have rid yourself of the cause of your depression, believe it or not. At least, that's my personal philosophy and way that I live. It's not for everyone.
Thank you all, ladies, for your compassionate and supportive words! Waking up to your support made my day! It’s tough to find one’s tribe of like souls these days. I’m so sorry you’re all feeling similar thoughts and living the same “tip-toe through life without offending the sheep sensibilities” facade as I am. And I appreciate hearing you say, AnnR, that I shouldn’t keep hiding my truth but should speak out, with respect, but with conviction. You are correct! We are the rational minds! I’ve been the odd duck in my world from birth and have kept my mouth shut and fumed internally, for the most part, learning, early on, the sting of standing up for myself and potentially stealing another’s spotlight. I was born to a narcissist mother and absent father and I seem to have gravitated to even more of these ego-centric personalities. Amazingly, the sheep, in my life anyway, seem to think they’re superior to anyone who thinks differently than they do. There’s a smugness of faux intelligence among them all. I was born in the southern part of the U.S. and now am embedded in a family firmly entrenched in the northeast, so I’ve always felt they’ve looked down on me like some sort of lesser, unworthy heathen since I’ve no Ivy League heritage and that anyone from south of Manhatten must be a redneck, flag waving, gun-toting, MAGA cultist. Perhaps finding my joy will be where I least expected it to come from; in standing up for the truth, and speaking it with a genuine compassion for those who are actually not superior in their thinking, but lost and suffering their own mental blindness. With prayer and a genuine compassion for those I love and want to protect I will need to work on and improve my delivery from one of my current anger and frustration to that of a rational, reasonable, caring extension of God’s light and love. I love a challenge! And I don’t believe in coincidence so I thank God for bringing us together on the same frequency last night! Thank you all and please know I support you all as well! If you’d like to keep in touch, you can subscribe for free to “Cyn’s Challenge” here on SubStack, where I believe we can communicate through Notes and Chats? I’m still figuring it all out. Again, Thank you, Lauri, Vivian and Ann, for responding! 🥰
I should stop talking but I want to make one more point. Whatever one thinks about trump, his ascendancy to the presidency in 2016 and the resulting “plandemic”, did something karmic in our world-it figuratively (although I would posit it is almost Literally) blew the doors off the facade of our purported harmonious humanity. I think it has proven/demonstrated that there truly are only 2 primary human characteristics that define everything-and it IS the shrew/sheep innate character traits in humans. Look what we have discovered about ourselves, our loved ones, friends, colleagues, and society AS A WHOLE based on that human trait alone. It has crystallized everything for me.
I feel exactly the same way. In fact I feel like I could have written this myself. Sometimes it brings me close to tears to see how they simply do not care. Or just act like everything is normal. Just know that you are not alone.
Sometimes I wonder if the sheep are still sheep because their social status or their financial status is a direct result of the slave system and illusions that we live under. Why would they reconsider their version of reality, if it is working for them? Most of the staunch sheep that I know would have to surrender a significant amount of power and social status if they had to acknowledge that allopathy is just witchcraft and government is just theatre. Their subconscious has already seen where waking up will take them, and they don't want to come here with us, who can blame them?
I think it is the Matrix dilemma. Most people would want to stay in what seems to be comfort...nice steaks to eat, etc. then go into the hellhole that is reality. I do not think they are conscious of this...as you say, it is an unconscious state.
People, at least those in the opulent West, simply have it TOO comfortable...it is like getting out of a soft warm bed in the morning...and facing the harsh realities of a cold wet day. Who would want to do that?
see? i don't know if you're joking. i read a stat saying that 50 to 70% of folks don't have a running dialogue going on. i do. i'm honestly fascinated by this.
You mean a dialogue about what's going on? An awareness? A consciousness? I think sheep have a dialogue, but it doesn't involve anything more than a foot or so away from skin surface. Anything beyond that it is a monologue they listen to from what they have determined is authority.
this goes into the depths. i know. but i think it important to recognize. i always assumed everyone's brain was busy bleating constantly. i'm sure the quiet brains? are assuming the same thing. ideas?
Wow, that's a pretty low shrew estimate...but actually it wouldn't surprise me.
I worry often if all of these people I still love dearly will not make it. It doesn't seem to be going that extreme of a path, but if they all start getting jabbed again, or if as Vanden Bossche still predicts, a new "immune escape" variant hits this fall...game over.
This should be interesting.... I can't wait to read all the comments!! My husband and I are on the same page.. so I am thankful for that. I don't believe I could handle being married to a sheep.... would probably be ready to leave.
Sad thoughts. .. on both accounts ... first that things will get bad and second that your wife may end up throwing you out. My heart aches for you and for all the other shrews that must deal with a sheep spouse.
I say that with tongue in cheek. It isn't fair to speak for her...she loves me too...but I have always found it exceedingly odd that these people (sheep types) are so offended by us and our beliefs when we are only pointing out that we need to be careful, they the agenda puppeteers are lying, that vaccines could be devastatingly dangerous, that censorship of any sort is bad, on and on. We are the good guys, why are we hated so much?
I'm a super shrew and married to a semi-shrew. He didn't get taken in by any of the Convid stuff and wasn't the least bit tempted to take the jab just to fly or go to a restaurant. However, he had and continues to have very little (if any) patience when it comes to discussing any of it. I have no idea how far down the rabbit hole he has ventured but am quite sure he hasn't gone nearly as deep as I have.
I know I am very fortunate but it has still been very difficult because I always felt that I *should* be able to share podcasts and articles with him but he was not interested. I was thankful he would don the face diaper in order to buy groceries when I refused, but part of me saw him as weak for doing so. Even now I have to go to a different room to listen to podcasts even if they have nothing to do with Convid because he associates everything I listen to with that horrible time. To his credit, he has gone along with my Plan B program and I'm thankful for it.
So all in all I have had it better than most, but still hated that I couldn't bitch and moan with him when I thought our disgust with everything that was happening should have brought us together. It did drive a wedge between us but as things have improved for us dissenters so has our relationship. Over the 3+ years of madness I have become much better at self-censoring, even with shrews who just don't want to talk about it all. I think we've all had to hone our self-censoring!
That's an interesting case. There certainly are people who don't buy into the whole "conspiracy" element of it, but just don't trust the medical part—a vaccine rushed through so fast, and a sensationalized "count" of covid deaths and infections.
People like that are about 10% down the hole. We hit WEF and WHO control at about 30% down. Full blown genocide and intentional vaccinational homicide at 90% and Satan himself running the show at 100% (I'm pretty close to 98% or so).
I find one of the most difficult parts of having the sheep wife is not being able to discuss things with her...thank god my shrew sister and I get together for a 3+ hour phone call every week to talk shrew-speak.
Some comments I read over here saddens and horrifies me. I thought that I went through a mental hell of the plandemic times(not regarding my other half but the state of madness in general) but some people had to live with realisation that the madness is in their homes, sleeping next to them.
For me there has been a certain sort of “deadening” which I can’t say is a good thing. I feel my body and most of my conscious mind is thinking things are ok…the part of my conscious mind that knows that isn’t true is the part that reads, writes for this substack and off-guardian.
But the real danger is in my unconscious, which I believe is very much aware of the rotting body in the basement. No matter how clear it is that the person I live with, and all the other people she interfaces with—her son who comes and visits with his girlfriend, her daughter who lives overseas—are clearly living in this “life as usual” world, talking about jobs, prices of houses, food and restaurants, vacations….no matter how clear this make believe world is, I know in my gut, in my unconscious world, that the body in the basement is going to start to stink up the whole house, or worse still, will come up the stairs as a living undead and eat us alive…and I am SICK about this. I think it is a lot worse state to be in than a state of true awareness. It is deceiving and frightening, and causes loss of sleep, nightmares, depression, and the like.
We can have a Buddhist approach. Compassion and wisdom.
We know why people ignore the obvious, they are afraid. Why they are afraid? Because the unknown is scary. It's easier to pretend that we are in control of inner and the outer worlds.
So-called elite is not stupid. They were working for aeons in perfecting the control tools.
They know that humans are not perfect and they know what makes us click and what makes us stay still. Fear is one of those tools. Pride is another.
I never understood when newagers say that love heals everything. I still don't fully get it. What I understood that acceptance of other people's ways is much better approach, as long as they don't step on my toes that is :)
I take on this approach when dealing with my wife and her kids and my sister and her husband and anyone else really close. For the most part I just don't think about it...but do wonder all of the time what they think of me...which I suspect is probably not very flattering.
I think you are in a not so great place. I'm not being sarcastic. If I'm reading your words correctly, you are thinking of taking a "diversionary" path in your marriage that you never foresaw and never wanted to consider, but in a karmic sense, you feel you may have no choice? Or am I reading way too much into this?
No…not at all. I am having no thoughts about doing anything in my marriage. I may drive my wife nuts with all my conspiracy talk if this thing blows up more than it has already, but I am here for the duration…it is my obligation to her to be by her side through thick and thin.
Great topic. As I've stated here before, I am definitely a shrew. My wife is definitely a sheep. But she is a sheep who does read, just that it is mainstream sources like the New York Times, the Toronto Star and the Guardian. So she *thinks* she is well read and understands everything. But I have given up trying to make her see that she only understands what they want her to.
We have stayed together through all this because we both tend to avoid conflict and have a "live and let live" attitude. I know she is not happy that I refuse to follow the script. I'm not happy that I can't have meaningful conversations with her. But I decided a while back that I would rather have someone with me as we approach the apocalypse rather than be alone. There are still days where I question that decision however.
I know it's not my job to convince anyone of anything. All I can do is to let people know where I stand when they ask. Once they know, if they are curious they can always ask more questions. If not, they are free to do whatever they please.
Early on, I would cringe when we watched certain things. I found myself watching a lot of the late night shows to see their perspective on the ever maddening world. But then I started to realize they were part of the propaganda. So I stopped watching and after awhile she asked me why I didn't watch those shows and I just said that I didn't think they were funny anymore (which was true). The other day, we watched the new Jim Gaffigan special (and I truly don't recommend it because we both thought it wasn't funny). He started out wearing a mask, then made some very crude comments about "anti-vaxxers" but it didn't rile me up as much as it had done a few years ago. I thought if they keep carrying on like this, it might just wake up more of the sheep out there who would start feeling uncomfortable about it.
Anyway, that is where I'm at. I just wish there was some way to get the shrews together but if it was too obvious, then undesirables would descend. Maybe we need some kind of secret hand signal or handshake or wear a certain kind of shirt. I'm open to ideas.
Yes!! I do remember you are a fellow s/s mix! We must keep in touch. I do about the same as you...just keep the peace. And my wife too is very intelligent and well informed, although not very political and certainly not with a "world view" acumen. My one sister is like that too...always quoting the NYT, WP or NPR...she thinks following NPR is very progressive...and maybe even "alt"...
I have a similar feeling these days with the sheep. All this is going to get so obvious to them I feel content just letting it all happen...they will know soon enough. At first there was a frantic effort to "save them all" from the vax...now that they have all gotten it multiple times, there really is no point. I also don't want to make them sad...convincing them of the mistake they have made...
"All this is going to get so obvious to them I feel content just letting it all happen...they will know soon enough. At first there was a frantic effort to "save them all" from the vax...now that they have all gotten it multiple times, there really is no point."
I sent you an email a while back after an article of yours appeared on off-guardian and I was looking to get in touch with local shrews. I'll try sending you another mentioning my substack handle. I used to live north of Newmarket so I'm very familiar with Aurora but I don't get up there much these days. But maybe I can drive up sometime and we can trade "war stories". ;-)
You know, I have been VERY lame responding and keeping up with people...and even worse identifying people here on Shrew Views by their "handles"...once I see your email I will remember...I haven't lost that yet...and YES let's get together!
It would be so interesting to be partnered with a super-shrew. Even my first wife (who has been dead for 20 years) didn't pay much attention to what was going on when she and I were together...Kennedy's assassination I was fascinated with, she could not have cared less. She didn't argue about stuff, but just wasn't much interested...
We were in Cancun when the Twin Towers were assaulted, and although it took a while before I "got it" she wasn't much interested in that either (one reason is that she was in the throes of dying of cancer when that event took place).
It would be interesting to be with someone as mesmerized by all of this as I am.
Sad to hear about your first wife even she past away a long time ago.
We are complex creatures and those who have no spiritual side are doomed to comply with any BS they are told to comply. I am lucky that my missus "talks to the universe".
Besides that, she is very sensitive, she relies on here emotional side more than on the logical side of things. Sometimes it causes some issues but I rather deal with those issues that with issues that a "normie" wife would bring home.
P.S
Have you come across a half shrew and a half sheep? I have few colleagues who are like that, they took clot shots but at the same time they knew that it is a wrong thing to do.
Well, I was hoping to hear from from shrews married to sheep in the comments (I particularly appreciated Nathan's comment). Because I truly, truly don't know how to survive this. Covid completely destroyed my narrative and ripped everything to shreds. I married out of a patriarchal (and by that I mean "Father is God in the home") ideology, very much as a means of escape, though I'd never have admitted it back then. He's a gentle man, but there has always been a deep lacking between us. In my pride, however, I never could see it. Because my "victim of patriarchy" narrative had to be right. I had to have made the right choice. I had to have married the perfect man for me. Yet a year or so before covid I sat that man down and said "I feel like there's nothing between us but the children, and when the kids are gone, then what?" He said, "We don't need to worry about that." And then covid. And. Then. Covid. And not just covid. It started before covid, really. It was the "no more babies", then covid, then the defense of trans terminology and the obliteration of the feminine in the birthing world (I am a doula - crushed on every level). He's always played the "devil's advocate" and I realized he just was the Devil's advocate. And it took covid to destroy my pride, to destroy my narrative, to clearly see my role in the entire thing. So we co-exist. We're co-habitating co-parents, but there's nothing there. He's not someone I want to be friends with even, and he's never made any effort to really know me (computers are easier - he's a programmer; women aren't, artistic women even less so). Any attempts I made at showing me views were met with Politico articles. And then it all breaks and he said "Let's do therapy", but what he really meant was "Something's wrong with you, let's fix YOU." Nevermind that I've been visiting therapists of varying modalities off and on all along, meeting with mentors, close friends, my pastor, my family (whom I was restored with during all of this)...and him? Nothing. No one. He listens to his BBC, got jabbed because microsoft told him to even though he works from home, drinks his wine, eats his ice cream, watches netflix almost every evening, goes to "men's nights" where they talk about literally nothing personal. Him, and many of my friends, very much fell/fall into that very intelligent, but angsty christian/"social justice" world, and it was just crazy how they all fell for it...some even double masking when the single masks didn't work.
I wish I had advice. I realize I am just blabbing here. I'm someone who loves writing poetry (and boy has all this provided fodder for the musing!) so this word vomit I am writing is slightly offensive even to myself. I homeschool, he works from home, we're never more than 20 feet apart almost all the time, and I'm exhausted at the Nothingness. There's no depth, there's no relationship, and the worst of it is, I don't think I even want it. And yet...and yet I don't believe in divorce (particularly not for a differing of opinions). And I sit and feel my fertility fade away with the children I'll never have (and I wouldn't even try if he said yes...I can't risk that, I already have one special needs child - which is a whole other factor in all of this).
I know...I KNOW that God is something working in all of this (at the very least, He is in my heart, even if I am tormented daily). I KNOW He can make good of even this. His Word and his promises are my very life. And even if that is the only thing that comes of this, then this was worth it.
I feel your pain and will hold you in my heart. You deserve more as many of us do, but we stick to it and support what we’ve created. Hang in there; youre not alone.
Think back at all the women you have been in your short life. Think back at the earlier versions of you who made really stupid decisions or fear based decisions, or just naïve decisions. Aren't you glad that they are not making decisions for you any more? Another version of you will come some day. She is an older women, who has lost her dark hair, all of her youthful features have begun to fade as a first sign that she won't need this body forever. She is there, with dreams of love and laughter and the same creative heart that you have now hoping that you are not making really really stupid decisions for her. She will not benefit one iota from your suffering. In fact everything that you suffer now will be a double burden for her because she cannot change it.
This life is short. If there were going to be more jewels in your crown for suffering rather than finding your way to a joyful life, what would be the need for a savior? You could just cash in your tears for a seat with the king. But that doesn't work. And you will serve this world better if you don't leave the care and keeping of your own heart to others. There is no day coming when it will be easy to leave him and chose your own life instead. In fact every single day that you put it off it will get harder. You have a lot of life yet to live, the next version of you is waiting for you to have courage and step out in faith that you deserve more, and you do.
It saddens me so to hear this story. There are so many men out there that seriously miss the mark in being even decent husbands...they may cover some of the prominent masculine archetypes, but are missing the "lover" and "magician"....two key archetypes in being a good partner to a woman...his queen and precious princess. I see many men in my practice missing this in our current culture...and it is very sad.
I am assuming he is also a super-sheep to your shrew...which of course makes it worse.
I would say you need to consider leaving that marriage...but if you do not believe in divorce there is not much you can do except accept the fact you will never have what it is you deserve and try to make a life independent from that "system" you are currently forced to live within. Find a therapist that specializes in archetypal psychology...or one certified and trained in Relational Life Therapy...
I went from married to single during the plandemic, complete with court delays that lasted from three to six months, "because of connid." My ex-sheep did everything in his sheepish power to burn himself into my memory during those three years.
Before the divorce was finalized, I had to retrieve personal items from the house I had lived in for a few decades where my ex sheep and his young ewe had resided ever since the day that I left.
My return to the house was an event that the ex sheep had been dreaming of for months. Of course everything that I was there to retrieve had already magically vanished. The ex-sheep desperately wanted all five-two, one-hundred-fifteen-pounds of me to do something threatening so that he could cry wolf. The whole day was booby trapped with passive aggressive landmines for me. I had been given clear instructions, multiple times, that I must wear a mask to enter the premises, this was on a court document that I had to sign.
When I walked through the same door that I must have entered no less than ten thousand times before, there was a full display of sheepish trust in “authority” The “patriotic” fervor (thank you government PsyOp) and dutiful slave mentality required of all good sheep were readily apparent.
The entry way looked like a surgeon’s prep station. There was a bench just inside the door completely covered in opened economy boxes of masks, rubber gloves, alcohol swabs, and spray pumps of rubbing alcohol, along with a half gallon pump of hand sanitizer. The matching set of clear plastic face shields were a joy to behold. I’m sure that they are eating dinner in them to this day.
Those people, I mean sheep, are living an existence that demands that they battle the angel of death all day every single day of their lives. Their survival requires that they obey the television, and fear everyone else, including each other.
It’s possible that I’m just too lazy to be that paranoid, but then again, I read the vaccine inserts for Pfizer, Moderna, and J&J early on in 2019 and a fifth grader could have seen their vague verbiage and the obvious inconsistencies between their claims and their data.
I made several trips past that sanitation station in my old entry way that day. It was a great comfort to me. Even though I had wasted decades of my life trying to make peace with someone who couldn’t make peace with himself, a new ewe had taken my post. She was proving herself completely worthy of the endeavor.
The divorce was finalized at the end of 2020. Coincidentally the first round of Pfizer shots became available that same week. As you can imagine, my ex pulled strings with medical friends to cut to the front of the line in front of the elderly to get his injection. Good for him!
He was a trim person who had exercised regularly and had eaten the organic food that I prepared for the decades. In 2021 he had a heart attack followed by an angioplasty procedure. In 2022 he married his ewe and had a second heart attack that same month. Then he had a failed angioplasty procedure. I didn’t get all the details but apparently whatever they put in his artery to open it up got stuck and clogged it up worse instead. Then there were a few months for him in bed waiting to see a surgeon but then he had a successful triple bypass, and all is well now!
I am a bit gun shy about the dating scene, the first thing that I’ve noticed is that everyone in it has gotten so fat and wrinkly since 1984. Actually, after fifty the dating scene is OVER. Whatever is left out there is still available for a reason, me included.
Statistically, somewhere in those leftovers there should be a few genuine kind people and there are. But among the genuine kind people who might make excellent companions the vast majority of them are sheep who will be needing a young ewe to care for them when their heart attacks start. The tiny handful of shrews that could be fun people to hang out with are at home, like me, doing the math on their prospects and deciding to practice piano, grow their garden and find some cool places to hike or fish, instead.
I guess the best thing to come out of this was confirmation that you needed to move on. It's not easy but you've seen what the alternative entailed.
While you are sticking your toe into the murky waters of post-convid dating, maybe it might be good to correspond with shrews who might not be testing those same waters but might be perched on a nearby fence looking on curiously. Something to ponder.
OMG...I have never heard anything so intense!! Good lord...I am speechless.
I have heard that many of these heart conditions are misdiagnosed...i.e., they perform angioplasties, stents, etc. for the wrong reasons...and they typically do not work. Any medical doctors out there to comment (I only know of one for sure II...wow, just noticed your cool initials!!)
Anyway...thanks for sharing this...I hope at least you are feeling better being free of that nightmare...
Aug 6, 2023·edited Aug 6, 2023Liked by Todd Hayen, PhD, RP
Todd, Vivian's story is certainly intense. The one aspect that you mention... and refer to me... angioplasties, stents... like many technological developments in medicine, are many times overused and "overvalued". But for good or bad, they have become so "standard"... My observation ("anecdotal") - like for so many other medical problems - is the "coincidence" that in the past I would know of one or two friends every year who had myocardial infarctions, angioplasties, stents... after becoming "vaccinated" now I count dozens. "Coincidences"...
I saw a specialist "diet doctor" a while back, Dr. John McDougall (he was featured in the documentary "Forks Over Knives"--a super vegan). He had quite a bit to say about stents and other cardio interventions...100% against most of them...had good scientific basis for his opinion as well. I believe his MD speciality was cariology as well, although not certain.
I was speaking more of the current vaccine related heart issues...myocarditis, blood clots, and other spike protein related issues. I have read in several places that when doctors now see these odd anomalies they cannot diagnose them properly because they have not seen gene therapy/mRNA pathologies...so they throw in stents, etc. I have a close friend that was diagnosed with clogged arteries soon after his second Covid jab. He is a super sheep, and of course no one correlated his sudden heart disease with the shots—I did.
Yes. Many of us question the "overplayed" value of stents and angioplasties for "regular" heart conditions. With these new events, consquence of the "vaxxines"... nobody knows anything.
The last update that I had was almost a year ago now. His recovery from the triple bypass was extremely slow and his heart rate remained dangerously high for at least three months afterward. Good grief, what a clusterfuck. It's so bizarre to watch the results of the eugenics stab play out just as predicted, meanwhile the world goes on about their business complaining about gas prices and driving their kids to soccer.
There is some sci-fi movie or book I've read where everyone is suffering from some terrible affliction like boils, or horns coming out of their head, or whatever, and everyone is just carrying on with their life like nothing is happening...I think that is what is going on now..."oh, Uncle Bob dropped dead last week, just didn't wake up, he was only 35, could you pass the mashed potatoes please? Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot your hand went numb yesterday and you can't move your fingers, does the other hand still work?"
Quite frankly I do too, and once in a while I do wonder if I am the one that is completely out of his mind...but then I see all of you, and all of the "celebrities" like Kennedy, Big Tree, Russell Brand, James Corbett, Malone, McCullough...and countless others...and it snaps me back into this dark reality
I have a friend who is married to a sheep wife. She had made plans to get their kids Covid vaxxed. He normally just lets his wife make the decisions on kid things. But he fought very hard to prevent his kids from getting that shot, and he prevailed. I admire him a lot for that. For myself, I thank God that my wife is a shrew. I can only imagine what circle of Hell it would be for me if she wasn’t, especially as we have young kids.
This is the worse...a s/s mix with kids...I CANNOT imagine how difficult that would be!! I know one of those too, and it has not been pretty...particularly when the kids are old enough to be sheep themselves...and beg their shrew parent to get the shot so they can play with their friends!! Or participate in sports! Or whatever....
Thoughts for dealing with sheep....married 58 years next month to a shrew.
1. Be kind, and never try to teach sheep to sing. You will frustrate yourself and annoy the sheep. Even St. Paul gave up on some individuals.
2. Focus on one important thing at a time and let that fact sink in. Many sheep require baby steps.
3. Remember that we are not fighting sheep per se. "We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." Ephesians
4. Be compassionate. If God has awarded you with insight and intelligence above others, use it for good and for the protection of helpless sheep.
5. Finally, be strong in the Lord and of good courage.
Very nice, Nathan. I agree compassion needs to be exercised at times. However, frankly, protecting sheep enables them to continue being sheep instead of learning. This, in part, is why weak minded people continue to breed more weak minded children and the world continues to devolve.
I love this: "We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." Ephesians
Your quote of Ephesians is certainly noteworthy. Ever since the beginning of the "pandemic" I have shared with several "like-minded friends" (shrews) that all this certainly has spiritual origins. Most people that I share this thought seem to agree, but no one follows my suggestion that there may be some "action" we can do on that plane... Don't ask me what it would be; we would need to figure it out. But it has to be considered in the first place.
America needs spiritual revival in the hearts of the people. . I often wonder if we are indeed entering the end time days predicted in Revelation…."for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: That they all might be damned who believed not the truth, but had pleasure in unrighteousness." I’m 85 years old and have seen much in this life. I have reached the point where I believe our only hope is in the Lord and in his righteousness. Pray without ceasing.
Hey Brother Nathan...I think you are probably right, as frightening as that prospect is...I did not used to be this "Biblical" until now...it is pretty much right on.
And I agree that the basic tenets of being one with God is the only thing that will save us. I do not believe we have to all adhere to ONE religion, or religious dogma, but the basic tenets of love, pure and righteous character, the discernment between right and wrong/good and evil, and the respect and honor of God's creation (nature), must be adhered to.
Basically, she knows how I am 🐁* and I know how she is. 🐑 Neither of us will change. Too set in our ways. But we both know that, so no problem. However when the SHTF, she 🐑 will probably come around!!!!
Nope............whole family on the same page.......we learned long ago..............The family that prays together, stays together. Covid never stood a chance.
One thing I've noticed is that the Covid divide has been used not only to justify any existing animosity. but to further it. A kind of "Hmmph! I knew he was weird" kind of thing. What gives me a little comfort is in looking back at them and thinking, "Hmmph! I knew you were stupid." So, I guess I'm guilty of escalating the animosity, too.
If your associations were shaky before, covid just flushed them out for you. Like a bird dog flushing pheasants. Covid flushed for me nicely. It was the perfect loyalty/sanity psy-op. I used it to test and filter away the kooks, the rats and the weak minded, brainwashed dummies. On the other side of covid you now KNOW who your true people are. Covid worked splendidly.
There is no one in my circle that thinks like I do. I have felt very much on the outside and if I didn't have faith in my ability to analyze information from many sources, I would probably agree with them that I am just weird and a conspiracy theorist. But I DO research - intensely - and they don't. Most don't even read .books. They refuse to believe that life isn't just normal the way it has always been and that those in power just might not have their best interests at heart. It's just too terrifying and unthinkable. They need life to feel safe and normal. They need to believe that all people are "good at heart". Some are too emotionally fragile, some have too much ego, some are too busy. I remember the shock to my own paradigm when I learned something "different" Its always easier to say that I am nuts than to change and learn something scary - HUGELY SCARY. So, I don't even try any more. I think I shall always feel deeply alone. It is very upsetting after 49 years to fully realize that your life partner isn't who you thought they were. We were never faced with such a situation before, but it's too late for us. Todd, when I first heard you on an interview a few years ago - Jerm - when you asked what happened to your fellow liberals that went along with the official narrative, I felt so much relief that people like you are out there. It's nice to know. And I have hope that there are more people like Kennedy who have the energy and position to keep working for truth. I have to find comfort in Nature and all things beautiful.
BARB! You are not alone! I do get it! I want to share this with you (it was in my dad’s Bible):
“The man who fears to be alone will never be anything but lonely, no matter how much he may surround himself with people. But the man who learns, in solitude and recollection, to be at peace with his own loneliness, and to prefer it’s reality to the illusion of merely natural companionship, comes to know the invisible companionship of God.” -Thomas Merton
Renee, that is so very dear of you to reply with this. It is difficult to squeeze a life philosophy into a paragraph comment online. Yes, I am alone and FEEL it - but I do have pure peace in knowing that my soul is connected to all other souls and Universal consciousness - or God. Thank you.
You are so so so kind...words like yours are what keeps me doing this...it IS lonely, particularly for people like me hitched to a sheep.
The book reading thing is interesting...I cannot believe that most sheep do not read, but I don't know a single one that does, come to think of it. Well, they do READ, but not anything important. I am constantly reading...not just shrew stuff, but sheep stuff as well (well, as far as I can stomach it). I am so damned curious as to how all of this happened.
One thing that really does keep my up for all this is that there are so many people FAR FAR FAR more intelligent and informed than I am who are shrews...in fact, every shrew I know out there speaking and writing books I have so much respect for, and not a single prominent sheep (Fauci, Biden, et al) out there strikes me as a decent person...
I just listed a few of the perpetrators, who are not really sheep...but even the sheep folks that are talking are totally unimpressive (actually, very few sheep write or talk...the perps do, but the sheep lay low for the most part).
I like the phrase you used - "analyze information from many sources". I have always done that. It was especially important in my career as an IT Project Manager where I had to wade through the bullshit from the business, from vendors and so on and find a solution that would give them what they needed at a price the business could afford.
Those skills and experience have served me so well during convid. Actually, they have served me well from 9/11 onwards.
Don't worry Barb. You are not alone. There are many of us like minded people out there. It's just that we've learned that it is better to remain hidden until we need to make our presence known.
it wouldn't work for me. i took it all way too personally. i'm unable to forgive or forget. i have a friend who resisted the jab and is married to a full on CBC/ratchel maddow-ite. he slinks around terrified of upsetting her. not a great look. i can't imagine living with someone you're scared of. life is way too short for that nonsense. fortunately the hobbit kept a degree of sanity although she was badly frightened. one day she was wiping her mom's groceries down with the poisonous towelettes and looked at me saying "i know i'm crazy but i'll get over it". pretty awesome. then when it started to feel like they might start going door to door i suggested she might have to go to her mom's because it would get ugly if they rang the doorbell. she instantly said nope i'll stay beside you. so i'm very fortunate. more than i deserve.
"...he slinks around terrified of upsetting her. not a great look. i can't imagine living with someone you're scared of..." Sad to say, this is me. I am definitely afraid of upsetting my wife...not a good thing.
My husband passed away 15 years ago and over the last five years I often wondered if our marriage would have survived. 3 months after we were married he was diagnosed with terminal cancer. When we met I was a 45 year old liberal jewish girl from Brooklyn and he was was a God-fearing Catholic conservative from Texas. He opened my eyes to so many misconceptions about conservatives but on many levels I was still a sheep. My life long friends were all sheep. He didn’t fit in and it was torture. I learned to stay away from certain subjects. I chose not to engage. But something happens when you know your time together is short. You let opposing opinions slide. I did my best to choose to be happy... it no longer mattered if I thought or knew I was right. We didn’t have much time.
I wish he was here to see who I’ve become. I wish I could look him in the eye and beg his forgiveness for not supporting his opinions in private and in public. I know now how hard it must have been for him.
I believe the sheep will eventually wake up as I did. Patience and love will get you through.
Remember, God closes one door and opens another... even though sometimes it’s hell in the hallway.
Shelley, I often wonder what would have transpired between us if my husband had lived to see this day. He, too died of cancer (20 years ago). He was actually diagnosed 6 mos. before our planned wedding. We had nine years before he died -- in between was anxiety for both of us, and much caregiving on my part. He was all in for allopathic medicine, and I was...very skeptical. He DID listen to me and consider my arguments when I really made a case...However I gave deference to him because it was, after all, HIS body, his life. His entire family was and was/is completely on-board allopathy (including jabs, tests, procedures, etc). Who knows?! We couldn't have children, so that solved a big problem of divided perspective in joint decisions. In any case, I offer you much condolence for your loss and all my best wishes to you going forward. <3
Oh girl… We have such similar stories.😢 We also had 9 short years together. No children. I let him make his own health decisions for the same reason. It’s his life and his body. I did what I could. If I only knew then what I know now about alternative medicine. I don’t think he would have been able to deal with the world as it is now. Especially, the trafficking of children. That alone would have destroyed him. I used to get so angry watching him spend hours and hours online arguing with strangers about politics. And now, that’s exactly what I DO. Ironic.
Sending you my heartfelt condolences for your loss as well. God bless you.
So similar to my story. My first wife died of cancer 20 years ago (this June 5). We were together 28 years before. I do believe she would have been a shrew...but not as an intense one as I am...she too (like my present wife) would be more interested in finding the joy in the moment...but she definitely would have seen the lies, corruption, etc.
So many sorrowful and tragic stories. But...that is also Life Unfolding. I am all for joy in the moment. Goodness knows, very little joy is being forwarded by current main$tream Narratives, so we must pull our focus toward gratitude and the 'small' moments. I was surprised, even shocked (and relieved) by what my late husband and I could find to laugh about together, and share with regard to a given day not presenting a crisis. Colostomy bags. Hospice personnel. Etc. But I cannot bring myself to run at joy at the expense of truth and reality as I perceive it. Alas, in the opinion of many (whom I know and by whom I am surrounded) that is tantamount to being a "Debbie Downer". Such a "nit-picker" am I! But I beg to disagree. Only by recognizing the unpleasant can we also recognize the pleasant. No light without shadow, no shadow without light. Much love and compassion to you, T.H., to Shelley and to all <3
Dramatic story & lessons, Shelley. Thanks for sharing honestly. It's hard to say if a large number of sheep will awaken as you did..and I am glad you did. Probably a third or more of population is incapable of waking up. Many will die and are dying before they could ever wake up. That said, as the evil intensifies toward a peak those who are capable of becoming awake & aware will face even greater incentive to extract head out of the sand. Prayers are needed for as many who can be reached and those souls who will not.
I think most sheep will go down with the ship. Unless the evil ones admit they are Satan worshippers and laugh a maniacal laugh as they rub their hands together in evil joy. I don't see that happening...
My gut tells me you are more than likely correct. And I do appreciate the humor, after decades of eye-rolling and metaphorical throwing hands up in incredulity. 😅
I am keeping a foot in the door for people who do throw off the mind control, until the tipping point is reached..then it will be 100% effort into rebuilding with what we've got.
The sheep and shrew marriage portrait is my ALL TIME favorite illustration to your articles Todd….it has brought me joy in a worrisome day! Thank you! Too too fabulous!
I'm married to a fellow shrew. Since we owe our relatively happy adult lives to each other, I don't agree the single are the sanest, necessarily. Although that can be true. Advice? Easy, don't settle and hope to get lucky. I was 29, she was 23, both been through numerous relationships that ranged from tolerable to pretty good, but you have to remember - is this someone I want to spend my life with? Well, in our case, it was love at first sight and we never had a reason to reconsider. I knew I never wanted to let her go and she felt the same. If you're wondering whether he/she is the right one, you've already answered the question - and it's no. HOWEVER, if you find yourself approaching middle age and still haven't run across Mr/Miss sensational, what can you do? Either settle or resign to living forever alone. That's where the luck is so important. And remember, you're looking for sensational, not perfect. You aren't perfect either. And if your mate is sensational, he/she knows that too.
Aug 6, 2023·edited Aug 6, 2023Liked by Todd Hayen, PhD, RP
You'll never break through to a sheep if other sheep are present. They will take play devil's advocate on any issue whatsoever just for the sake of opposing your view - especially if you're known to be the "conspiracy theorist" and there is already some division from Covid stuff. Maybe you're trying to get through to them on the trans movement, or climate boiling, or 15 min cities, or CBDCs, or transhumanism. Whatever it may be, it works best when you have them one-on-one. Ask lots of questions, elicit *from* them what they already probably know through process of elimination. Find what they are unsure of or even remotely dubious about, and lean into that.
E.g. Someone in UK says that excess deaths are due to NHS delays from being overrrun, lockdowns, leading to misdiagnoses and cancer rates increasing. You can entertain their argument that whilst that *could* be true in the UK, it does not hold up because cancer rates and excess deaths are up everywhere in the world, and those other countries do not have an NHS. Different healthcare systems, but outcome is still massively increased excess deaths.
Try not to offer opinions (even well researched credible ones) on the *why*. They'll ask why why why are "they" doing this? Say you don't know, but you lay it out for them with the *what* is happening that is evidential. For if you blurt out the *why* on global enslavement / depopulation etc, you might lose them. Unless they are really curious, in a non-combative, non-condescending inquisitve manner, you might offer something like "well there is a wide consensus that this is happening because XYZ".
It's more effective to invalidate their regurgitated narrative soundbites through asking questions and drilling down into the dogma and the official stances, until they are simply refuted by facts and what has come to pass - rather than ranting at them, preaching at them. Don't blast them with links afterwards via message, you'll lose them. Wait. If after a few days / weeks they come back to you and have obviously been researching whatever you talked about, ask more questions.
Great advice.... sadly, I have been quick to send links to back up what I had said. I guess I should back off. However, I have found that they don't usually ask for any of my proof and they certainly don't seem to question anything that is going on (ie friends suddenly dying, getting cancers, etc) They think "life is back to normal" and they are proud they "did their part". Sad.
I did the same thing from 2020-2022. Most people on the receiving end of those messages angrily responded to tell me to stop sending links and that they would not be opening any of my links. Some even quipped that they only read news stories from "trusted verified sources", like the BBC and the Guardian...
I think your suggestion to stay away from the "why" with sheep is brilliant. You definitely don't want to get into "world rule" and all that...just stating facts, evidence, etc. and when asked "why?" you say "I don't know"...perfect.
I sincerely hope everyone can come to an equitable solution.
Fortunately for me, I don’t have this problem but I’d just like to make a suggestion that I try to apply when mingling with those of opposing views.
Whenever issues are particularly triggering i.e. based on fear and manifest in emotional reactions, I avoid the issue entirely. I try to discuss confidence building and emotionally reassuring topics – to reinforce our friendship and to respect their fundamental value as a human being. These qualities are more important than differences of opinion, especially when I know their opinions are fear-based and installed into them by malign sources.
I certainly don’t wish to add to their fear by insisting that what they believe (and is temporarily supporting them) is false, thus adding to their fear. When fearful one can’t absorb new info. as one’s defences are up. Anyway, in time, hopefully, when the triggering issue is fading, defences can be eased and a more accommodating atmosphere will allow a more civilized conversation.
For those who are just plain enjoying their aggressiveness, I divert the topic away from the triggering but onto a related issue to which they are unlikely to have constructed a defence. For example, with the ‘pandemic’ I muse on the withdrawal from the Gold Standard in the early 1970s and the subsequent financial mismanagement that has led to unpredictable events and panicked reactions.
I have not been in a shrew/sheep argument since Christmas, and do not care to ever repeat such a thing. It is difficult remaining silent with my wife and one of my sisters...but it is all that I can do. Any shreep friends are long gone.
Hopefully, one day, this too shall pass. In the meantime, as Churchill was reported as saying every night before he went to sleep, during WWII - "Bugger Everybody."
Aug 6, 2023·edited Aug 6, 2023Liked by Todd Hayen, PhD, RP
I’m not married, but I deal on a daily basis with sheep, whether they are family, friends, acquaintances, or mere people I meet in everyday life. I recognize two kinds of sheep: the ones that are intrinsically ignorant, but not totally stupid, and totally used to follow orders no matter from whom they come, and the sheep that, in spite of being more or less educated, are so strongly manipulated and conditioned by the establishment that are absolutely unable to see beyond the mainstream rules, and these are a totally lost case.
The first ones are easy to deal with: depending on their level of understanding, sometimes it is possible to talk to them and to expose some crucial lines of thought. Some of them, if explanations are sufficiently simple and logic, are willing to listen and I’m sure they give it a second thought.
The second ones are, in my opinion, the true sheep. They follow, they obey, they blindly and irrationally defend the indefensible. It’s of no use to debate with them. Their minds are crystalized, solidified. Their education taught them to dogmatically accept whatever is politically correct and no argument, as smart, rational and senseful as it can be, can move them from their dogmatic ideas. These sheep are the favorites of the global elites. They were educated to obey, not to doubt, question or investigate.
So, regarding the first ones, if I see they present a breach through which some reasoning can slip to, I do talk to them and debate until some light is brought about. With the second ones, I refuse to debate. It’s totally useless. In this case I prefer to say loudly “You’re right” and think to myself “You’re an idiot”. I know this sounds pretty ugly, but three years passed, my patience is at very low levels...
Aug 6, 2023·edited Aug 6, 2023Liked by Todd Hayen, PhD, RP
Hey Todd. You just brought a topic that has been a mystery to me for these three years. I know you have talked about your "shrew-sheep" relation quite frequently. I am very confused when I see a couple out in the street, and one of them is wearing a mask and the other is not. What is going on with these people? Fortunately, I can say that my dear wife is not a sheep. She is very much aware of all the fallacies that we have discussed so much. The only issue I have had to deal with her is that - as a coleague physician - she has been very careful not to "antagonize" or "offend" other doctors, and has influenced me about the same. If it were not for her, I would certainly had been much more vocal calling other doctors for the absurdities they have allowed our profession to promote (diagnose a "covid case" with a laboratory test, "asymptomatic transmission", quarantine healthy people, count a "covid death" by a pcr result, mRNA "vaccines"...). If it were up to me, I would have called almost every fellow medical doctor and ask: Where in medical school did you learn that crap? When did you order in the past a laboratory test for an acute disease to an asymptomatic patient? When did you ever fill a death certificate based on a laboratory test?... My dear wife has led me to keep a civil relationship with other physicians, although I am so dissapointed in them. I look forward to reading comments from people who are in shrew-sheep relationships.
I think there is a time where this sort of tolerance is favorable. The least friction and conflict we cause the better. Unfortunately I believe a time will come where we begin to realize that this sort of complacency actually becomes the very reason that the world will go through untold misery. I am just as guilty as the next person in this regard. I have tried to keep the peace with my wife, my sister, my friends, my colleagues, my patients, my doctors....I am worried sick that one day I will regret it very much.
You are lucky and so wise. My wife and I are both shrews too, but as you point out, shrews can help each other learn and deal. We like to think we're smart enough to see when the other's way is better, to learn and change, best we can. In a shrew/sheep relationship that can't happen. The sheep has little to offer, and while the shrew might, the sheep isn't receptive. Sheep/sheep? I don't even want to think about it, although I've been forced to the last few years, unfortunately.
Hey, just because you're both shrews doesn't mean it's always peaceful! Something Cat Stevens said about a hard-headed woman comes to mind. My girl, who's 67 is not only still hot, she's hot-headed as well as hard-headed. I'm sure it can be peaceful, your shrew can vary.
Remember that change is constant and never ending. Adaptation is the best way.
I can honestly say that I only have sheep leaning family members, not my spouse (Thank you Jesus). The only friends I have left AC that were friends BC are shrews that became so at different times and speeds but have arrived in pretty much the same space as I'm in. I find it very hard to make small talk at the best of times so "pretending/self-censoring to get along" is just too much for me. As one person I met AC says, cut the branch off, it's not going to heal. If someone were to reach out to me and sincerely want to know how I am that might work, but even BC most people only asked how you are as a greeting not a true question. So I guess I'm not that helpful. I think had my husband not been willing to look at the hard truth with me, we'd be divorced now. When you know, you know.
You’re welcome, Todd. I’m glad you’ll check it out - there are some amazing folks in the group and dedicated to supporting each other through these times and still be in service to others in a deeply meaningful way. N Carolina has more shrews than you might think! I have been active in helping develop a community of “awarelings” (my word for us) and we now number about 50 in this rural, mountain area and meet monthly or more for over 2 years!
Hi Todd - I have been following your substack for awhile and very much appreciate your perspective on our current situation. I’m a psychologist living rurally in the NC Mountains and felt befuddled and alone when the narrative re:C19 rolled out in 2020 and not a single local colleague in my field saw through the psy ops. I wanted to make you aware of a support group for those of us who are shrews in the field called Differently Aware Psychological Therapists. It is out of the UK and meets weekly on Fridays. It is an international group and it’s free. They host an occasional introductory workshop via EventBrite for new folks. The next is on September 15. They also have a telegram channel. They do vett all newcomers to make sure they are who they claim to be. I can give more information and the link to the EventBrite event if you’re interested. I shed shrew tears of joy the first time I connected with these folks from UK, Australia, NZ, Crete, Germany (too many countries to mention) and realized we are everywhere!
Do you have some links? I can't seem to find anything.
If you go to EventBrite and search for events under “Differently Aware Psychological Therapists” you will see the introductory support workshop event on September 15. You can register for free. They will vett you, however, to make sure you are who you say you are.
This is wonderful information...thank you so much for bringing this to my attention. I will definitely check it out...
Yeah, I would suspect that NC would be mostly sheep...one of my previously best friends...a REALLY close friend, lives in Clemson...the Carolina to the south of you. I grew up in Virginia...so I know a bit about the old south.
It’s so great to hear there are truth tellers in your field! Thank you! We all need you!
Is there a directory of Differently Aware Psychological Therapists you could share with us?
There is no directory that I am aware of at this time but am hoping someone is developing one.
It is important for me to say and be clear, my wife is an amazing human being. I love her dearly, she is kind, sweet, incredibly intelligent….I could go on and on. But alas, she IS “sheeplike”….since I know her well, maybe she doesn’t fall into all of the nuances of being a sheep. I do know she believes in the narrative. She believes in being a good citizen, and doing what you are told (although she pays little attention to speed limits on the freeway.)
I am dedicated to her…and will be with her as long as she will be with me…but that is the very thing that worries me…her beliefs do not bother me, not enough to not be tolerant and patient, but I am afraid that MY beliefs bother her much more than I would think they should…there’s the rub. But who knows…again, when the shit REALLY hits the fan…who knows. For now I do trust that her intelligence will come through and she will take care of herself…
But who knows…it doesn’t seem like that is what is happening with most people…
I’m not really sure how I feel reading all this; a bit ill, actually, because it brings startling reality to the fact that I have settled with living a facade among and placating the sheep in my life. I feel outwardly that I am the one out of place; the odd duck, the weirdo. I feel I’ve been dropped into the wrong movie. Everyone else just wants to live in La-La land, not rocking the boat, pretending everything is peachy. I want to scream so many times daily, “ How can you be so fucking blind, so pathetically complacent? Why doesn’t any of this matter to you?!” And yet, I’m sure they feel as helpless as I do. What’s the point of talking about something we can’t effect?
Even my conservative friends don’t want to talk about it. Instead they focus on the cute antics of their grandchildren. Grandchildren I know we’re leaving to the wolves. But I end up being the pariah for mentioning anything, ever, at all. I can’t be me, I can’t express my true feelings. I have to go along with the meaningless surface drivel about absolutely nothing important.
My semi-sheep, closet conservative, partner is French Canadian and does not ever want conflict, (is this a normal trait among the FCs?) especially with his super-sheep family members. Again, I’m the outsider and he cautions me constantly about saying anything about the news. Even though he watches the controversial stations, he knows I read voraciously and I believe he knows I’m knowledgeable and right about much of what I try to tell him that the infotainment want address, but I see that he rolls his eyes and tries to change the subject most times I try to discuss topics in more depth. He’s a conservative when it comes to his business activities, but I really consider him a RINO; he would never stand up for conservative principles for fear of looking bad in front of others. It’s all about preserving his image among those with whom he wants to fit in with. I see this attitude as indicative of the sad shape we’re in in this country, overall. There are no revolutionaries who will stand and fight to preserve our freedoms today; they all assume someone else will do the dirty work and save their butts when it all hits the fan. They don’t want to stick out, be labeled “right-wing” or MAGA. It’s depressing and most days I feel emotionally and physically defeated. I find little joy in life amidst all the pathetic apathy. I feel like I’m just going through the motions of a fake life. I feel I’m simply living out a sentence until I’m either thrown in jail or shot for my my beliefs. And perhaps that would be a relief. It would end the play-acting. No one really cares anymore. They just want to go to cocktails and dinner and chit chat about nothing. Like everything’s fine. For now.
I can’t get excited about traveling as I’m terrified a plane will fall out of the sky when a pilot strokes out in the flight deck. I don’t want the hassle of traveling abroad and running into the vax-passport Gestapo due to some recently changed border rule. It’s just really taken all the wind from my sails. I feel like I’m treading water. I can’t un-know what I know. I can’t just let it all go and live in ignorant bliss. I’m drawn into reading more; it’s addictive. I know I’m clinically and chronically depressed but all the therapists seem to be liberals or at least have to adhere to the mainstream dogma of rainbows and Unicorns . I don’t know how to find my joy anymore. What’s there to be joyful about? I know cognitively that God will reign supreme in the end but I’m not sure I’m cut out for the continuous bullshit and struggle until that day of reckoning. I don’t tolerate stupidity and incompetence well. I’m constantly amazed at how truly disengaged in life people are. I know I should love the sheep as Jesus would and shine his light of truth on the world, but my batteries are depleted. I want to subscribe to “we’re all one as God’s children” but I just don’t think I can take much more. I must be an alien; from a distant planet that doesn’t fit in this game board. Am I the only one? Hoping sleep silences the frustration for awhile.
Cyn, I feel the same way :( You have said it all....
Gord lord Cyn...you took all those words out of my mouth. I am continually astonished, and relieved, so many people are sharing the exact same thing...how fascinating...down to the minute details. I guess it proves we are all made of the same stuff...
Thank you for this...
I sympathize and felt somewhat the same way. But there IS joy. Being alive is a joy. And I truly believe that fighting the fight is THE reason to live right now. And to be grateful that we are alive right now to fight the fight. If you don't feel the joy anymore, give it a shot to start speaking your mind to all the sheep, all the RINOs, all the people who you have been required to tiptoe around. When you want to say something, but hold yourself back, stop, say to yourself, "dammit, I'm SAYING it", and then spit it out in a calm, reasonable (like you are talking to children) way, smile, and say, "as any rational, thinking person would agree". I think you will feel the yoke of depression fall off your shoulders. Trust me, it worked for me. Because the REAL test is to see who remains your friend/ally/lover/partner. The people who TRULY care about you will be remaining, the ones who don't will leave. And as sad as you think that will be, and it WILL feel like a sucker punch, you will feel freed - because you will have rid yourself of the cause of your depression, believe it or not. At least, that's my personal philosophy and way that I live. It's not for everyone.
This is why I write...as dark as my writing is sometimes, it is the only thing I do that makes me feel human...AND reading all your comments!!
Thank you all, ladies, for your compassionate and supportive words! Waking up to your support made my day! It’s tough to find one’s tribe of like souls these days. I’m so sorry you’re all feeling similar thoughts and living the same “tip-toe through life without offending the sheep sensibilities” facade as I am. And I appreciate hearing you say, AnnR, that I shouldn’t keep hiding my truth but should speak out, with respect, but with conviction. You are correct! We are the rational minds! I’ve been the odd duck in my world from birth and have kept my mouth shut and fumed internally, for the most part, learning, early on, the sting of standing up for myself and potentially stealing another’s spotlight. I was born to a narcissist mother and absent father and I seem to have gravitated to even more of these ego-centric personalities. Amazingly, the sheep, in my life anyway, seem to think they’re superior to anyone who thinks differently than they do. There’s a smugness of faux intelligence among them all. I was born in the southern part of the U.S. and now am embedded in a family firmly entrenched in the northeast, so I’ve always felt they’ve looked down on me like some sort of lesser, unworthy heathen since I’ve no Ivy League heritage and that anyone from south of Manhatten must be a redneck, flag waving, gun-toting, MAGA cultist. Perhaps finding my joy will be where I least expected it to come from; in standing up for the truth, and speaking it with a genuine compassion for those who are actually not superior in their thinking, but lost and suffering their own mental blindness. With prayer and a genuine compassion for those I love and want to protect I will need to work on and improve my delivery from one of my current anger and frustration to that of a rational, reasonable, caring extension of God’s light and love. I love a challenge! And I don’t believe in coincidence so I thank God for bringing us together on the same frequency last night! Thank you all and please know I support you all as well! If you’d like to keep in touch, you can subscribe for free to “Cyn’s Challenge” here on SubStack, where I believe we can communicate through Notes and Chats? I’m still figuring it all out. Again, Thank you, Lauri, Vivian and Ann, for responding! 🥰
I should stop talking but I want to make one more point. Whatever one thinks about trump, his ascendancy to the presidency in 2016 and the resulting “plandemic”, did something karmic in our world-it figuratively (although I would posit it is almost Literally) blew the doors off the facade of our purported harmonious humanity. I think it has proven/demonstrated that there truly are only 2 primary human characteristics that define everything-and it IS the shrew/sheep innate character traits in humans. Look what we have discovered about ourselves, our loved ones, friends, colleagues, and society AS A WHOLE based on that human trait alone. It has crystallized everything for me.
God bless you Cyn
Thank you! And May God bless you in your own personal journey! You are doing his great work right here!🥰🙏🏻
I approve of this message!
I feel exactly the same way. In fact I feel like I could have written this myself. Sometimes it brings me close to tears to see how they simply do not care. Or just act like everything is normal. Just know that you are not alone.
Sometimes I wonder if the sheep are still sheep because their social status or their financial status is a direct result of the slave system and illusions that we live under. Why would they reconsider their version of reality, if it is working for them? Most of the staunch sheep that I know would have to surrender a significant amount of power and social status if they had to acknowledge that allopathy is just witchcraft and government is just theatre. Their subconscious has already seen where waking up will take them, and they don't want to come here with us, who can blame them?
I think it is the Matrix dilemma. Most people would want to stay in what seems to be comfort...nice steaks to eat, etc. then go into the hellhole that is reality. I do not think they are conscious of this...as you say, it is an unconscious state.
People, at least those in the opulent West, simply have it TOO comfortable...it is like getting out of a soft warm bed in the morning...and facing the harsh realities of a cold wet day. Who would want to do that?
ok. next question. how many folk have dialogues in their heads?
I have considered writing a book named Conversations in My Head
or how 'bout, 'the lost art of refining arguments in the shower"?
I’m in constant dialogue in my head!
I do all the time!
Not sure what you mean...
see? i don't know if you're joking. i read a stat saying that 50 to 70% of folks don't have a running dialogue going on. i do. i'm honestly fascinated by this.
I was dumbfounded when I also read that recently. I have a constant dialogue.
But I have asked my wife many times, what are you thinking?
She says .........nothing particular, and I believe her.
I think most sheep have no dialogue.
You mean a dialogue about what's going on? An awareness? A consciousness? I think sheep have a dialogue, but it doesn't involve anything more than a foot or so away from skin surface. Anything beyond that it is a monologue they listen to from what they have determined is authority.
this goes into the depths. i know. but i think it important to recognize. i always assumed everyone's brain was busy bleating constantly. i'm sure the quiet brains? are assuming the same thing. ideas?
I feel like it is me against the world usually. My Wife and adult children are all sheep.
I tried to teach, question everything GOVT does. The corrupt Education system stole my
Family.Thankfully, God restored my ability to love and forgive.
I refused to allow my wife to get vaxxed. I advised the kids wait and see first. No need to hurry.
Good advice ignored. Will I outlive my children?
Your article War of the Worlds is first rate!
Every day is tough. My faith helps me cope. I believe the shrews are less than 5% of the US.
Sad to say, not near enough people have moved from World A to World B.
Wow, that's a pretty low shrew estimate...but actually it wouldn't surprise me.
I worry often if all of these people I still love dearly will not make it. It doesn't seem to be going that extreme of a path, but if they all start getting jabbed again, or if as Vanden Bossche still predicts, a new "immune escape" variant hits this fall...game over.
This should be interesting.... I can't wait to read all the comments!! My husband and I are on the same page.. so I am thankful for that. I don't believe I could handle being married to a sheep.... would probably be ready to leave.
If things get bad, as I am sure they will, and my wife doesn't flip, I think it will be her that throws me out..😀
If she hasn't flipped by now, how could she possibly flip when they ramp up the terror? That will never happen.
When they ramp up the terror she won't throw you out, she will call the Gestapo.
We’ll see…but I know what you mean. I am prepared for whatever happens. I am worried about her and her kids of course…I won’t be running out on them…
Sad thoughts. .. on both accounts ... first that things will get bad and second that your wife may end up throwing you out. My heart aches for you and for all the other shrews that must deal with a sheep spouse.
I say that with tongue in cheek. It isn't fair to speak for her...she loves me too...but I have always found it exceedingly odd that these people (sheep types) are so offended by us and our beliefs when we are only pointing out that we need to be careful, they the agenda puppeteers are lying, that vaccines could be devastatingly dangerous, that censorship of any sort is bad, on and on. We are the good guys, why are we hated so much?
I'm a super shrew and married to a semi-shrew. He didn't get taken in by any of the Convid stuff and wasn't the least bit tempted to take the jab just to fly or go to a restaurant. However, he had and continues to have very little (if any) patience when it comes to discussing any of it. I have no idea how far down the rabbit hole he has ventured but am quite sure he hasn't gone nearly as deep as I have.
I know I am very fortunate but it has still been very difficult because I always felt that I *should* be able to share podcasts and articles with him but he was not interested. I was thankful he would don the face diaper in order to buy groceries when I refused, but part of me saw him as weak for doing so. Even now I have to go to a different room to listen to podcasts even if they have nothing to do with Convid because he associates everything I listen to with that horrible time. To his credit, he has gone along with my Plan B program and I'm thankful for it.
So all in all I have had it better than most, but still hated that I couldn't bitch and moan with him when I thought our disgust with everything that was happening should have brought us together. It did drive a wedge between us but as things have improved for us dissenters so has our relationship. Over the 3+ years of madness I have become much better at self-censoring, even with shrews who just don't want to talk about it all. I think we've all had to hone our self-censoring!
That's an interesting case. There certainly are people who don't buy into the whole "conspiracy" element of it, but just don't trust the medical part—a vaccine rushed through so fast, and a sensationalized "count" of covid deaths and infections.
People like that are about 10% down the hole. We hit WEF and WHO control at about 30% down. Full blown genocide and intentional vaccinational homicide at 90% and Satan himself running the show at 100% (I'm pretty close to 98% or so).
I find one of the most difficult parts of having the sheep wife is not being able to discuss things with her...thank god my shrew sister and I get together for a 3+ hour phone call every week to talk shrew-speak.
just wow. sorry. so fascinating. i keep reading these stories. wow.
Some comments I read over here saddens and horrifies me. I thought that I went through a mental hell of the plandemic times(not regarding my other half but the state of madness in general) but some people had to live with realisation that the madness is in their homes, sleeping next to them.
If I discovered that my husband was a sheep, I honestly would have left him. I don't love ANYONE that much.
For me there has been a certain sort of “deadening” which I can’t say is a good thing. I feel my body and most of my conscious mind is thinking things are ok…the part of my conscious mind that knows that isn’t true is the part that reads, writes for this substack and off-guardian.
But the real danger is in my unconscious, which I believe is very much aware of the rotting body in the basement. No matter how clear it is that the person I live with, and all the other people she interfaces with—her son who comes and visits with his girlfriend, her daughter who lives overseas—are clearly living in this “life as usual” world, talking about jobs, prices of houses, food and restaurants, vacations….no matter how clear this make believe world is, I know in my gut, in my unconscious world, that the body in the basement is going to start to stink up the whole house, or worse still, will come up the stairs as a living undead and eat us alive…and I am SICK about this. I think it is a lot worse state to be in than a state of true awareness. It is deceiving and frightening, and causes loss of sleep, nightmares, depression, and the like.
We can have a Buddhist approach. Compassion and wisdom.
We know why people ignore the obvious, they are afraid. Why they are afraid? Because the unknown is scary. It's easier to pretend that we are in control of inner and the outer worlds.
So-called elite is not stupid. They were working for aeons in perfecting the control tools.
They know that humans are not perfect and they know what makes us click and what makes us stay still. Fear is one of those tools. Pride is another.
I never understood when newagers say that love heals everything. I still don't fully get it. What I understood that acceptance of other people's ways is much better approach, as long as they don't step on my toes that is :)
I take on this approach when dealing with my wife and her kids and my sister and her husband and anyone else really close. For the most part I just don't think about it...but do wonder all of the time what they think of me...which I suspect is probably not very flattering.
I think you are in a not so great place. I'm not being sarcastic. If I'm reading your words correctly, you are thinking of taking a "diversionary" path in your marriage that you never foresaw and never wanted to consider, but in a karmic sense, you feel you may have no choice? Or am I reading way too much into this?
No…not at all. I am having no thoughts about doing anything in my marriage. I may drive my wife nuts with all my conspiracy talk if this thing blows up more than it has already, but I am here for the duration…it is my obligation to her to be by her side through thick and thin.
This is so well said, it made me cackle and cackle even though I understand that there are uncried tears behind this humor.
Hey Todd,
Great topic. As I've stated here before, I am definitely a shrew. My wife is definitely a sheep. But she is a sheep who does read, just that it is mainstream sources like the New York Times, the Toronto Star and the Guardian. So she *thinks* she is well read and understands everything. But I have given up trying to make her see that she only understands what they want her to.
We have stayed together through all this because we both tend to avoid conflict and have a "live and let live" attitude. I know she is not happy that I refuse to follow the script. I'm not happy that I can't have meaningful conversations with her. But I decided a while back that I would rather have someone with me as we approach the apocalypse rather than be alone. There are still days where I question that decision however.
I know it's not my job to convince anyone of anything. All I can do is to let people know where I stand when they ask. Once they know, if they are curious they can always ask more questions. If not, they are free to do whatever they please.
Early on, I would cringe when we watched certain things. I found myself watching a lot of the late night shows to see their perspective on the ever maddening world. But then I started to realize they were part of the propaganda. So I stopped watching and after awhile she asked me why I didn't watch those shows and I just said that I didn't think they were funny anymore (which was true). The other day, we watched the new Jim Gaffigan special (and I truly don't recommend it because we both thought it wasn't funny). He started out wearing a mask, then made some very crude comments about "anti-vaxxers" but it didn't rile me up as much as it had done a few years ago. I thought if they keep carrying on like this, it might just wake up more of the sheep out there who would start feeling uncomfortable about it.
Anyway, that is where I'm at. I just wish there was some way to get the shrews together but if it was too obvious, then undesirables would descend. Maybe we need some kind of secret hand signal or handshake or wear a certain kind of shirt. I'm open to ideas.
Yes!! I do remember you are a fellow s/s mix! We must keep in touch. I do about the same as you...just keep the peace. And my wife too is very intelligent and well informed, although not very political and certainly not with a "world view" acumen. My one sister is like that too...always quoting the NYT, WP or NPR...she thinks following NPR is very progressive...and maybe even "alt"...
I have a similar feeling these days with the sheep. All this is going to get so obvious to them I feel content just letting it all happen...they will know soon enough. At first there was a frantic effort to "save them all" from the vax...now that they have all gotten it multiple times, there really is no point. I also don't want to make them sad...convincing them of the mistake they have made...
Carry on brother...
"All this is going to get so obvious to them I feel content just letting it all happen...they will know soon enough. At first there was a frantic effort to "save them all" from the vax...now that they have all gotten it multiple times, there really is no point."
Excellent summation.
I sent you an email a while back after an article of yours appeared on off-guardian and I was looking to get in touch with local shrews. I'll try sending you another mentioning my substack handle. I used to live north of Newmarket so I'm very familiar with Aurora but I don't get up there much these days. But maybe I can drive up sometime and we can trade "war stories". ;-)
You know, I have been VERY lame responding and keeping up with people...and even worse identifying people here on Shrew Views by their "handles"...once I see your email I will remember...I haven't lost that yet...and YES let's get together!
What can I say, my other half is a shrew and not an ordinary one but a crazy (in a good sense) one :)
Back in 2010, she told me to look up at the sky and explain what those long lines were.
I thought that she was crazy but then I noticed them everywhere. That's how I started my journey down the so-called rabbit hole.
I think, without her, I would have been caught in the nets of the evil system many times.
Sometimes she drives me crazy but I always will be grateful for her that she has kept me sane in this insane world.
It would be so interesting to be partnered with a super-shrew. Even my first wife (who has been dead for 20 years) didn't pay much attention to what was going on when she and I were together...Kennedy's assassination I was fascinated with, she could not have cared less. She didn't argue about stuff, but just wasn't much interested...
We were in Cancun when the Twin Towers were assaulted, and although it took a while before I "got it" she wasn't much interested in that either (one reason is that she was in the throes of dying of cancer when that event took place).
It would be interesting to be with someone as mesmerized by all of this as I am.
Sad to hear about your first wife even she past away a long time ago.
We are complex creatures and those who have no spiritual side are doomed to comply with any BS they are told to comply. I am lucky that my missus "talks to the universe".
Besides that, she is very sensitive, she relies on here emotional side more than on the logical side of things. Sometimes it causes some issues but I rather deal with those issues that with issues that a "normie" wife would bring home.
P.S
Have you come across a half shrew and a half sheep? I have few colleagues who are like that, they took clot shots but at the same time they knew that it is a wrong thing to do.
Is it a cognitive dissonance in action?
Well, I was hoping to hear from from shrews married to sheep in the comments (I particularly appreciated Nathan's comment). Because I truly, truly don't know how to survive this. Covid completely destroyed my narrative and ripped everything to shreds. I married out of a patriarchal (and by that I mean "Father is God in the home") ideology, very much as a means of escape, though I'd never have admitted it back then. He's a gentle man, but there has always been a deep lacking between us. In my pride, however, I never could see it. Because my "victim of patriarchy" narrative had to be right. I had to have made the right choice. I had to have married the perfect man for me. Yet a year or so before covid I sat that man down and said "I feel like there's nothing between us but the children, and when the kids are gone, then what?" He said, "We don't need to worry about that." And then covid. And. Then. Covid. And not just covid. It started before covid, really. It was the "no more babies", then covid, then the defense of trans terminology and the obliteration of the feminine in the birthing world (I am a doula - crushed on every level). He's always played the "devil's advocate" and I realized he just was the Devil's advocate. And it took covid to destroy my pride, to destroy my narrative, to clearly see my role in the entire thing. So we co-exist. We're co-habitating co-parents, but there's nothing there. He's not someone I want to be friends with even, and he's never made any effort to really know me (computers are easier - he's a programmer; women aren't, artistic women even less so). Any attempts I made at showing me views were met with Politico articles. And then it all breaks and he said "Let's do therapy", but what he really meant was "Something's wrong with you, let's fix YOU." Nevermind that I've been visiting therapists of varying modalities off and on all along, meeting with mentors, close friends, my pastor, my family (whom I was restored with during all of this)...and him? Nothing. No one. He listens to his BBC, got jabbed because microsoft told him to even though he works from home, drinks his wine, eats his ice cream, watches netflix almost every evening, goes to "men's nights" where they talk about literally nothing personal. Him, and many of my friends, very much fell/fall into that very intelligent, but angsty christian/"social justice" world, and it was just crazy how they all fell for it...some even double masking when the single masks didn't work.
I wish I had advice. I realize I am just blabbing here. I'm someone who loves writing poetry (and boy has all this provided fodder for the musing!) so this word vomit I am writing is slightly offensive even to myself. I homeschool, he works from home, we're never more than 20 feet apart almost all the time, and I'm exhausted at the Nothingness. There's no depth, there's no relationship, and the worst of it is, I don't think I even want it. And yet...and yet I don't believe in divorce (particularly not for a differing of opinions). And I sit and feel my fertility fade away with the children I'll never have (and I wouldn't even try if he said yes...I can't risk that, I already have one special needs child - which is a whole other factor in all of this).
I know...I KNOW that God is something working in all of this (at the very least, He is in my heart, even if I am tormented daily). I KNOW He can make good of even this. His Word and his promises are my very life. And even if that is the only thing that comes of this, then this was worth it.
I feel your pain and will hold you in my heart. You deserve more as many of us do, but we stick to it and support what we’ve created. Hang in there; youre not alone.
Think back at all the women you have been in your short life. Think back at the earlier versions of you who made really stupid decisions or fear based decisions, or just naïve decisions. Aren't you glad that they are not making decisions for you any more? Another version of you will come some day. She is an older women, who has lost her dark hair, all of her youthful features have begun to fade as a first sign that she won't need this body forever. She is there, with dreams of love and laughter and the same creative heart that you have now hoping that you are not making really really stupid decisions for her. She will not benefit one iota from your suffering. In fact everything that you suffer now will be a double burden for her because she cannot change it.
This life is short. If there were going to be more jewels in your crown for suffering rather than finding your way to a joyful life, what would be the need for a savior? You could just cash in your tears for a seat with the king. But that doesn't work. And you will serve this world better if you don't leave the care and keeping of your own heart to others. There is no day coming when it will be easy to leave him and chose your own life instead. In fact every single day that you put it off it will get harder. You have a lot of life yet to live, the next version of you is waiting for you to have courage and step out in faith that you deserve more, and you do.
This is beautiful. Your words are medicine.
It saddens me so to hear this story. There are so many men out there that seriously miss the mark in being even decent husbands...they may cover some of the prominent masculine archetypes, but are missing the "lover" and "magician"....two key archetypes in being a good partner to a woman...his queen and precious princess. I see many men in my practice missing this in our current culture...and it is very sad.
I am assuming he is also a super-sheep to your shrew...which of course makes it worse.
I would say you need to consider leaving that marriage...but if you do not believe in divorce there is not much you can do except accept the fact you will never have what it is you deserve and try to make a life independent from that "system" you are currently forced to live within. Find a therapist that specializes in archetypal psychology...or one certified and trained in Relational Life Therapy...
I went from married to single during the plandemic, complete with court delays that lasted from three to six months, "because of connid." My ex-sheep did everything in his sheepish power to burn himself into my memory during those three years.
Before the divorce was finalized, I had to retrieve personal items from the house I had lived in for a few decades where my ex sheep and his young ewe had resided ever since the day that I left.
My return to the house was an event that the ex sheep had been dreaming of for months. Of course everything that I was there to retrieve had already magically vanished. The ex-sheep desperately wanted all five-two, one-hundred-fifteen-pounds of me to do something threatening so that he could cry wolf. The whole day was booby trapped with passive aggressive landmines for me. I had been given clear instructions, multiple times, that I must wear a mask to enter the premises, this was on a court document that I had to sign.
When I walked through the same door that I must have entered no less than ten thousand times before, there was a full display of sheepish trust in “authority” The “patriotic” fervor (thank you government PsyOp) and dutiful slave mentality required of all good sheep were readily apparent.
The entry way looked like a surgeon’s prep station. There was a bench just inside the door completely covered in opened economy boxes of masks, rubber gloves, alcohol swabs, and spray pumps of rubbing alcohol, along with a half gallon pump of hand sanitizer. The matching set of clear plastic face shields were a joy to behold. I’m sure that they are eating dinner in them to this day.
Those people, I mean sheep, are living an existence that demands that they battle the angel of death all day every single day of their lives. Their survival requires that they obey the television, and fear everyone else, including each other.
It’s possible that I’m just too lazy to be that paranoid, but then again, I read the vaccine inserts for Pfizer, Moderna, and J&J early on in 2019 and a fifth grader could have seen their vague verbiage and the obvious inconsistencies between their claims and their data.
I made several trips past that sanitation station in my old entry way that day. It was a great comfort to me. Even though I had wasted decades of my life trying to make peace with someone who couldn’t make peace with himself, a new ewe had taken my post. She was proving herself completely worthy of the endeavor.
The divorce was finalized at the end of 2020. Coincidentally the first round of Pfizer shots became available that same week. As you can imagine, my ex pulled strings with medical friends to cut to the front of the line in front of the elderly to get his injection. Good for him!
He was a trim person who had exercised regularly and had eaten the organic food that I prepared for the decades. In 2021 he had a heart attack followed by an angioplasty procedure. In 2022 he married his ewe and had a second heart attack that same month. Then he had a failed angioplasty procedure. I didn’t get all the details but apparently whatever they put in his artery to open it up got stuck and clogged it up worse instead. Then there were a few months for him in bed waiting to see a surgeon but then he had a successful triple bypass, and all is well now!
I am a bit gun shy about the dating scene, the first thing that I’ve noticed is that everyone in it has gotten so fat and wrinkly since 1984. Actually, after fifty the dating scene is OVER. Whatever is left out there is still available for a reason, me included.
Statistically, somewhere in those leftovers there should be a few genuine kind people and there are. But among the genuine kind people who might make excellent companions the vast majority of them are sheep who will be needing a young ewe to care for them when their heart attacks start. The tiny handful of shrews that could be fun people to hang out with are at home, like me, doing the math on their prospects and deciding to practice piano, grow their garden and find some cool places to hike or fish, instead.
Brava Vivian, thanks for your strength.
Your observation "Whatever is left...", that's classic, thanks for making me smile..
fishing with a shore lunch helps everything.
I guess the best thing to come out of this was confirmation that you needed to move on. It's not easy but you've seen what the alternative entailed.
While you are sticking your toe into the murky waters of post-convid dating, maybe it might be good to correspond with shrews who might not be testing those same waters but might be perched on a nearby fence looking on curiously. Something to ponder.
OMG...I have never heard anything so intense!! Good lord...I am speechless.
I have heard that many of these heart conditions are misdiagnosed...i.e., they perform angioplasties, stents, etc. for the wrong reasons...and they typically do not work. Any medical doctors out there to comment (I only know of one for sure II...wow, just noticed your cool initials!!)
Anyway...thanks for sharing this...I hope at least you are feeling better being free of that nightmare...
Todd, Vivian's story is certainly intense. The one aspect that you mention... and refer to me... angioplasties, stents... like many technological developments in medicine, are many times overused and "overvalued". But for good or bad, they have become so "standard"... My observation ("anecdotal") - like for so many other medical problems - is the "coincidence" that in the past I would know of one or two friends every year who had myocardial infarctions, angioplasties, stents... after becoming "vaccinated" now I count dozens. "Coincidences"...
I saw a specialist "diet doctor" a while back, Dr. John McDougall (he was featured in the documentary "Forks Over Knives"--a super vegan). He had quite a bit to say about stents and other cardio interventions...100% against most of them...had good scientific basis for his opinion as well. I believe his MD speciality was cariology as well, although not certain.
I was speaking more of the current vaccine related heart issues...myocarditis, blood clots, and other spike protein related issues. I have read in several places that when doctors now see these odd anomalies they cannot diagnose them properly because they have not seen gene therapy/mRNA pathologies...so they throw in stents, etc. I have a close friend that was diagnosed with clogged arteries soon after his second Covid jab. He is a super sheep, and of course no one correlated his sudden heart disease with the shots—I did.
Yes. Many of us question the "overplayed" value of stents and angioplasties for "regular" heart conditions. With these new events, consquence of the "vaxxines"... nobody knows anything.
The last update that I had was almost a year ago now. His recovery from the triple bypass was extremely slow and his heart rate remained dangerously high for at least three months afterward. Good grief, what a clusterfuck. It's so bizarre to watch the results of the eugenics stab play out just as predicted, meanwhile the world goes on about their business complaining about gas prices and driving their kids to soccer.
There is some sci-fi movie or book I've read where everyone is suffering from some terrible affliction like boils, or horns coming out of their head, or whatever, and everyone is just carrying on with their life like nothing is happening...I think that is what is going on now..."oh, Uncle Bob dropped dead last week, just didn't wake up, he was only 35, could you pass the mashed potatoes please? Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot your hand went numb yesterday and you can't move your fingers, does the other hand still work?"
LMAO! 🎯
I think watching the zombies just keep going and going like nothing is happening is the most mind bending aspect of this entire war.
Quite frankly I do too, and once in a while I do wonder if I am the one that is completely out of his mind...but then I see all of you, and all of the "celebrities" like Kennedy, Big Tree, Russell Brand, James Corbett, Malone, McCullough...and countless others...and it snaps me back into this dark reality
Jesus Christ! What a revealing story. Five years ago, I would say something like that could not happen in reality; but now I know it certainly can.
Reality is stranger than fiction.
Crazy, eh?
Wow. Your writing is powerful and insightful.
I have a friend who is married to a sheep wife. She had made plans to get their kids Covid vaxxed. He normally just lets his wife make the decisions on kid things. But he fought very hard to prevent his kids from getting that shot, and he prevailed. I admire him a lot for that. For myself, I thank God that my wife is a shrew. I can only imagine what circle of Hell it would be for me if she wasn’t, especially as we have young kids.
This is the worse...a s/s mix with kids...I CANNOT imagine how difficult that would be!! I know one of those too, and it has not been pretty...particularly when the kids are old enough to be sheep themselves...and beg their shrew parent to get the shot so they can play with their friends!! Or participate in sports! Or whatever....
Thoughts for dealing with sheep....married 58 years next month to a shrew.
1. Be kind, and never try to teach sheep to sing. You will frustrate yourself and annoy the sheep. Even St. Paul gave up on some individuals.
2. Focus on one important thing at a time and let that fact sink in. Many sheep require baby steps.
3. Remember that we are not fighting sheep per se. "We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." Ephesians
4. Be compassionate. If God has awarded you with insight and intelligence above others, use it for good and for the protection of helpless sheep.
5. Finally, be strong in the Lord and of good courage.
Very nice, Nathan. I agree compassion needs to be exercised at times. However, frankly, protecting sheep enables them to continue being sheep instead of learning. This, in part, is why weak minded people continue to breed more weak minded children and the world continues to devolve.
EXCELLENT!!! Thank you!!
I love this: "We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." Ephesians
Your quote of Ephesians is certainly noteworthy. Ever since the beginning of the "pandemic" I have shared with several "like-minded friends" (shrews) that all this certainly has spiritual origins. Most people that I share this thought seem to agree, but no one follows my suggestion that there may be some "action" we can do on that plane... Don't ask me what it would be; we would need to figure it out. But it has to be considered in the first place.
As you know, I have written several articles about this metaphysical perspective...
Yes. I know.
Yes - it is a spiritual war, it always has been.
America needs spiritual revival in the hearts of the people. . I often wonder if we are indeed entering the end time days predicted in Revelation…."for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: That they all might be damned who believed not the truth, but had pleasure in unrighteousness." I’m 85 years old and have seen much in this life. I have reached the point where I believe our only hope is in the Lord and in his righteousness. Pray without ceasing.
Hey Brother Nathan...I think you are probably right, as frightening as that prospect is...I did not used to be this "Biblical" until now...it is pretty much right on.
And I agree that the basic tenets of being one with God is the only thing that will save us. I do not believe we have to all adhere to ONE religion, or religious dogma, but the basic tenets of love, pure and righteous character, the discernment between right and wrong/good and evil, and the respect and honor of God's creation (nature), must be adhered to.
Agree 💯 Actually, I get a little scared when I hear some people I know talk about a "New One World Religion"...
Thank you for this comment. <3
Basically, she knows how I am 🐁* and I know how she is. 🐑 Neither of us will change. Too set in our ways. But we both know that, so no problem. However when the SHTF, she 🐑 will probably come around!!!!
* ( closest thing to a shrew emoji I could find )
Ah! A fellow sheep/shrew mix!
Nope............whole family on the same page.......we learned long ago..............The family that prays together, stays together. Covid never stood a chance.
Good for you!!
You are fortunate!
One thing I've noticed is that the Covid divide has been used not only to justify any existing animosity. but to further it. A kind of "Hmmph! I knew he was weird" kind of thing. What gives me a little comfort is in looking back at them and thinking, "Hmmph! I knew you were stupid." So, I guess I'm guilty of escalating the animosity, too.
If your associations were shaky before, covid just flushed them out for you. Like a bird dog flushing pheasants. Covid flushed for me nicely. It was the perfect loyalty/sanity psy-op. I used it to test and filter away the kooks, the rats and the weak minded, brainwashed dummies. On the other side of covid you now KNOW who your true people are. Covid worked splendidly.
I have thought of this...but I really cannot "flush" out my wife of 12 years, or my sister of 68 years...
There is no one in my circle that thinks like I do. I have felt very much on the outside and if I didn't have faith in my ability to analyze information from many sources, I would probably agree with them that I am just weird and a conspiracy theorist. But I DO research - intensely - and they don't. Most don't even read .books. They refuse to believe that life isn't just normal the way it has always been and that those in power just might not have their best interests at heart. It's just too terrifying and unthinkable. They need life to feel safe and normal. They need to believe that all people are "good at heart". Some are too emotionally fragile, some have too much ego, some are too busy. I remember the shock to my own paradigm when I learned something "different" Its always easier to say that I am nuts than to change and learn something scary - HUGELY SCARY. So, I don't even try any more. I think I shall always feel deeply alone. It is very upsetting after 49 years to fully realize that your life partner isn't who you thought they were. We were never faced with such a situation before, but it's too late for us. Todd, when I first heard you on an interview a few years ago - Jerm - when you asked what happened to your fellow liberals that went along with the official narrative, I felt so much relief that people like you are out there. It's nice to know. And I have hope that there are more people like Kennedy who have the energy and position to keep working for truth. I have to find comfort in Nature and all things beautiful.
BARB! You are not alone! I do get it! I want to share this with you (it was in my dad’s Bible):
“The man who fears to be alone will never be anything but lonely, no matter how much he may surround himself with people. But the man who learns, in solitude and recollection, to be at peace with his own loneliness, and to prefer it’s reality to the illusion of merely natural companionship, comes to know the invisible companionship of God.” -Thomas Merton
This quote has helped me a lot!
Renee, that is so very dear of you to reply with this. It is difficult to squeeze a life philosophy into a paragraph comment online. Yes, I am alone and FEEL it - but I do have pure peace in knowing that my soul is connected to all other souls and Universal consciousness - or God. Thank you.
You are so so so kind...words like yours are what keeps me doing this...it IS lonely, particularly for people like me hitched to a sheep.
The book reading thing is interesting...I cannot believe that most sheep do not read, but I don't know a single one that does, come to think of it. Well, they do READ, but not anything important. I am constantly reading...not just shrew stuff, but sheep stuff as well (well, as far as I can stomach it). I am so damned curious as to how all of this happened.
One thing that really does keep my up for all this is that there are so many people FAR FAR FAR more intelligent and informed than I am who are shrews...in fact, every shrew I know out there speaking and writing books I have so much respect for, and not a single prominent sheep (Fauci, Biden, et al) out there strikes me as a decent person...
I just listed a few of the perpetrators, who are not really sheep...but even the sheep folks that are talking are totally unimpressive (actually, very few sheep write or talk...the perps do, but the sheep lay low for the most part).
I like the phrase you used - "analyze information from many sources". I have always done that. It was especially important in my career as an IT Project Manager where I had to wade through the bullshit from the business, from vendors and so on and find a solution that would give them what they needed at a price the business could afford.
Those skills and experience have served me so well during convid. Actually, they have served me well from 9/11 onwards.
Don't worry Barb. You are not alone. There are many of us like minded people out there. It's just that we've learned that it is better to remain hidden until we need to make our presence known.
Yes, it's like most of the world has become the ignorant waitress from that Bill Hicks skit:
"What you readin' for?" not "What are you reading?"
it wouldn't work for me. i took it all way too personally. i'm unable to forgive or forget. i have a friend who resisted the jab and is married to a full on CBC/ratchel maddow-ite. he slinks around terrified of upsetting her. not a great look. i can't imagine living with someone you're scared of. life is way too short for that nonsense. fortunately the hobbit kept a degree of sanity although she was badly frightened. one day she was wiping her mom's groceries down with the poisonous towelettes and looked at me saying "i know i'm crazy but i'll get over it". pretty awesome. then when it started to feel like they might start going door to door i suggested she might have to go to her mom's because it would get ugly if they rang the doorbell. she instantly said nope i'll stay beside you. so i'm very fortunate. more than i deserve.
Good for you buddy...
"...he slinks around terrified of upsetting her. not a great look. i can't imagine living with someone you're scared of..." Sad to say, this is me. I am definitely afraid of upsetting my wife...not a good thing.
My husband passed away 15 years ago and over the last five years I often wondered if our marriage would have survived. 3 months after we were married he was diagnosed with terminal cancer. When we met I was a 45 year old liberal jewish girl from Brooklyn and he was was a God-fearing Catholic conservative from Texas. He opened my eyes to so many misconceptions about conservatives but on many levels I was still a sheep. My life long friends were all sheep. He didn’t fit in and it was torture. I learned to stay away from certain subjects. I chose not to engage. But something happens when you know your time together is short. You let opposing opinions slide. I did my best to choose to be happy... it no longer mattered if I thought or knew I was right. We didn’t have much time.
I wish he was here to see who I’ve become. I wish I could look him in the eye and beg his forgiveness for not supporting his opinions in private and in public. I know now how hard it must have been for him.
I believe the sheep will eventually wake up as I did. Patience and love will get you through.
Remember, God closes one door and opens another... even though sometimes it’s hell in the hallway.
So lovely, bless you Shelley.
That is beautiful...”I wish he was here to see who I’ve become.” Maybe that’s why your souls crossed.
Thank you for sharing this.
❤️ He made me a better person.
God bless you.
such a beautiful story...
Shelley, I often wonder what would have transpired between us if my husband had lived to see this day. He, too died of cancer (20 years ago). He was actually diagnosed 6 mos. before our planned wedding. We had nine years before he died -- in between was anxiety for both of us, and much caregiving on my part. He was all in for allopathic medicine, and I was...very skeptical. He DID listen to me and consider my arguments when I really made a case...However I gave deference to him because it was, after all, HIS body, his life. His entire family was and was/is completely on-board allopathy (including jabs, tests, procedures, etc). Who knows?! We couldn't have children, so that solved a big problem of divided perspective in joint decisions. In any case, I offer you much condolence for your loss and all my best wishes to you going forward. <3
Oh girl… We have such similar stories.😢 We also had 9 short years together. No children. I let him make his own health decisions for the same reason. It’s his life and his body. I did what I could. If I only knew then what I know now about alternative medicine. I don’t think he would have been able to deal with the world as it is now. Especially, the trafficking of children. That alone would have destroyed him. I used to get so angry watching him spend hours and hours online arguing with strangers about politics. And now, that’s exactly what I DO. Ironic.
Sending you my heartfelt condolences for your loss as well. God bless you.
Thank you, and God bless you.
So similar to my story. My first wife died of cancer 20 years ago (this June 5). We were together 28 years before. I do believe she would have been a shrew...but not as an intense one as I am...she too (like my present wife) would be more interested in finding the joy in the moment...but she definitely would have seen the lies, corruption, etc.
So many sorrowful and tragic stories. But...that is also Life Unfolding. I am all for joy in the moment. Goodness knows, very little joy is being forwarded by current main$tream Narratives, so we must pull our focus toward gratitude and the 'small' moments. I was surprised, even shocked (and relieved) by what my late husband and I could find to laugh about together, and share with regard to a given day not presenting a crisis. Colostomy bags. Hospice personnel. Etc. But I cannot bring myself to run at joy at the expense of truth and reality as I perceive it. Alas, in the opinion of many (whom I know and by whom I am surrounded) that is tantamount to being a "Debbie Downer". Such a "nit-picker" am I! But I beg to disagree. Only by recognizing the unpleasant can we also recognize the pleasant. No light without shadow, no shadow without light. Much love and compassion to you, T.H., to Shelley and to all <3
Dramatic story & lessons, Shelley. Thanks for sharing honestly. It's hard to say if a large number of sheep will awaken as you did..and I am glad you did. Probably a third or more of population is incapable of waking up. Many will die and are dying before they could ever wake up. That said, as the evil intensifies toward a peak those who are capable of becoming awake & aware will face even greater incentive to extract head out of the sand. Prayers are needed for as many who can be reached and those souls who will not.
I think most sheep will go down with the ship. Unless the evil ones admit they are Satan worshippers and laugh a maniacal laugh as they rub their hands together in evil joy. I don't see that happening...
Sometimes you are really funny.
My gut tells me you are more than likely correct. And I do appreciate the humor, after decades of eye-rolling and metaphorical throwing hands up in incredulity. 😅
I am keeping a foot in the door for people who do throw off the mind control, until the tipping point is reached..then it will be 100% effort into rebuilding with what we've got.
I think you holding that truth is important...that there IS hope...
Thank you for your kind words.
The sheep and shrew marriage portrait is my ALL TIME favorite illustration to your articles Todd….it has brought me joy in a worrisome day! Thank you! Too too fabulous!
I'm married to a fellow shrew. Since we owe our relatively happy adult lives to each other, I don't agree the single are the sanest, necessarily. Although that can be true. Advice? Easy, don't settle and hope to get lucky. I was 29, she was 23, both been through numerous relationships that ranged from tolerable to pretty good, but you have to remember - is this someone I want to spend my life with? Well, in our case, it was love at first sight and we never had a reason to reconsider. I knew I never wanted to let her go and she felt the same. If you're wondering whether he/she is the right one, you've already answered the question - and it's no. HOWEVER, if you find yourself approaching middle age and still haven't run across Mr/Miss sensational, what can you do? Either settle or resign to living forever alone. That's where the luck is so important. And remember, you're looking for sensational, not perfect. You aren't perfect either. And if your mate is sensational, he/she knows that too.
So so so so nice to hear!!
there's plushie shrew dolls?
YES!!! Lots of them! I have no idea why shrews are so popular in so many ways...but they were already so way before I labeled our movement "shrews"
quite shrewd of you i must say
You'll never break through to a sheep if other sheep are present. They will take play devil's advocate on any issue whatsoever just for the sake of opposing your view - especially if you're known to be the "conspiracy theorist" and there is already some division from Covid stuff. Maybe you're trying to get through to them on the trans movement, or climate boiling, or 15 min cities, or CBDCs, or transhumanism. Whatever it may be, it works best when you have them one-on-one. Ask lots of questions, elicit *from* them what they already probably know through process of elimination. Find what they are unsure of or even remotely dubious about, and lean into that.
E.g. Someone in UK says that excess deaths are due to NHS delays from being overrrun, lockdowns, leading to misdiagnoses and cancer rates increasing. You can entertain their argument that whilst that *could* be true in the UK, it does not hold up because cancer rates and excess deaths are up everywhere in the world, and those other countries do not have an NHS. Different healthcare systems, but outcome is still massively increased excess deaths.
Try not to offer opinions (even well researched credible ones) on the *why*. They'll ask why why why are "they" doing this? Say you don't know, but you lay it out for them with the *what* is happening that is evidential. For if you blurt out the *why* on global enslavement / depopulation etc, you might lose them. Unless they are really curious, in a non-combative, non-condescending inquisitve manner, you might offer something like "well there is a wide consensus that this is happening because XYZ".
It's more effective to invalidate their regurgitated narrative soundbites through asking questions and drilling down into the dogma and the official stances, until they are simply refuted by facts and what has come to pass - rather than ranting at them, preaching at them. Don't blast them with links afterwards via message, you'll lose them. Wait. If after a few days / weeks they come back to you and have obviously been researching whatever you talked about, ask more questions.
Slowly slowly gently. Elicit, don't explain.
Great advice.... sadly, I have been quick to send links to back up what I had said. I guess I should back off. However, I have found that they don't usually ask for any of my proof and they certainly don't seem to question anything that is going on (ie friends suddenly dying, getting cancers, etc) They think "life is back to normal" and they are proud they "did their part". Sad.
I did the same thing from 2020-2022. Most people on the receiving end of those messages angrily responded to tell me to stop sending links and that they would not be opening any of my links. Some even quipped that they only read news stories from "trusted verified sources", like the BBC and the Guardian...
I think your suggestion to stay away from the "why" with sheep is brilliant. You definitely don't want to get into "world rule" and all that...just stating facts, evidence, etc. and when asked "why?" you say "I don't know"...perfect.
Yeh but can be hard to bite your tongue! I was going to tag you in this Todd, gave you a shout out - https://open.substack.com/pub/nicholascreed/p/the-outcomes-of-labels-in-othering?r=16xjwn&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
Inspired me to write a piece on the othering labels after I commented on your "putting the sheep to bed" piece.
Great advice…thank you!
I sincerely hope everyone can come to an equitable solution.
Fortunately for me, I don’t have this problem but I’d just like to make a suggestion that I try to apply when mingling with those of opposing views.
Whenever issues are particularly triggering i.e. based on fear and manifest in emotional reactions, I avoid the issue entirely. I try to discuss confidence building and emotionally reassuring topics – to reinforce our friendship and to respect their fundamental value as a human being. These qualities are more important than differences of opinion, especially when I know their opinions are fear-based and installed into them by malign sources.
I certainly don’t wish to add to their fear by insisting that what they believe (and is temporarily supporting them) is false, thus adding to their fear. When fearful one can’t absorb new info. as one’s defences are up. Anyway, in time, hopefully, when the triggering issue is fading, defences can be eased and a more accommodating atmosphere will allow a more civilized conversation.
For those who are just plain enjoying their aggressiveness, I divert the topic away from the triggering but onto a related issue to which they are unlikely to have constructed a defence. For example, with the ‘pandemic’ I muse on the withdrawal from the Gold Standard in the early 1970s and the subsequent financial mismanagement that has led to unpredictable events and panicked reactions.
Ha, ha.
Blessings to you all.
Good stuff my friend...
I have not been in a shrew/sheep argument since Christmas, and do not care to ever repeat such a thing. It is difficult remaining silent with my wife and one of my sisters...but it is all that I can do. Any shreep friends are long gone.
Sending my kindest thoughts to you, Todd.
Hopefully, one day, this too shall pass. In the meantime, as Churchill was reported as saying every night before he went to sleep, during WWII - "Bugger Everybody."
Another great letter of information…thank you!!!
I’m not married, but I deal on a daily basis with sheep, whether they are family, friends, acquaintances, or mere people I meet in everyday life. I recognize two kinds of sheep: the ones that are intrinsically ignorant, but not totally stupid, and totally used to follow orders no matter from whom they come, and the sheep that, in spite of being more or less educated, are so strongly manipulated and conditioned by the establishment that are absolutely unable to see beyond the mainstream rules, and these are a totally lost case.
The first ones are easy to deal with: depending on their level of understanding, sometimes it is possible to talk to them and to expose some crucial lines of thought. Some of them, if explanations are sufficiently simple and logic, are willing to listen and I’m sure they give it a second thought.
The second ones are, in my opinion, the true sheep. They follow, they obey, they blindly and irrationally defend the indefensible. It’s of no use to debate with them. Their minds are crystalized, solidified. Their education taught them to dogmatically accept whatever is politically correct and no argument, as smart, rational and senseful as it can be, can move them from their dogmatic ideas. These sheep are the favorites of the global elites. They were educated to obey, not to doubt, question or investigate.
So, regarding the first ones, if I see they present a breach through which some reasoning can slip to, I do talk to them and debate until some light is brought about. With the second ones, I refuse to debate. It’s totally useless. In this case I prefer to say loudly “You’re right” and think to myself “You’re an idiot”. I know this sounds pretty ugly, but three years passed, my patience is at very low levels...
That's about the way it is for me as well...
Hey Todd. You just brought a topic that has been a mystery to me for these three years. I know you have talked about your "shrew-sheep" relation quite frequently. I am very confused when I see a couple out in the street, and one of them is wearing a mask and the other is not. What is going on with these people? Fortunately, I can say that my dear wife is not a sheep. She is very much aware of all the fallacies that we have discussed so much. The only issue I have had to deal with her is that - as a coleague physician - she has been very careful not to "antagonize" or "offend" other doctors, and has influenced me about the same. If it were not for her, I would certainly had been much more vocal calling other doctors for the absurdities they have allowed our profession to promote (diagnose a "covid case" with a laboratory test, "asymptomatic transmission", quarantine healthy people, count a "covid death" by a pcr result, mRNA "vaccines"...). If it were up to me, I would have called almost every fellow medical doctor and ask: Where in medical school did you learn that crap? When did you order in the past a laboratory test for an acute disease to an asymptomatic patient? When did you ever fill a death certificate based on a laboratory test?... My dear wife has led me to keep a civil relationship with other physicians, although I am so dissapointed in them. I look forward to reading comments from people who are in shrew-sheep relationships.
I think there is a time where this sort of tolerance is favorable. The least friction and conflict we cause the better. Unfortunately I believe a time will come where we begin to realize that this sort of complacency actually becomes the very reason that the world will go through untold misery. I am just as guilty as the next person in this regard. I have tried to keep the peace with my wife, my sister, my friends, my colleagues, my patients, my doctors....I am worried sick that one day I will regret it very much.
You are lucky and so wise. My wife and I are both shrews too, but as you point out, shrews can help each other learn and deal. We like to think we're smart enough to see when the other's way is better, to learn and change, best we can. In a shrew/sheep relationship that can't happen. The sheep has little to offer, and while the shrew might, the sheep isn't receptive. Sheep/sheep? I don't even want to think about it, although I've been forced to the last few years, unfortunately.
I ponder what it would be like if my wife were a shrew...it would be so wonderful, peaceful, and supportive. But alas.
Hey, just because you're both shrews doesn't mean it's always peaceful! Something Cat Stevens said about a hard-headed woman comes to mind. My girl, who's 67 is not only still hot, she's hot-headed as well as hard-headed. I'm sure it can be peaceful, your shrew can vary.
Fortunately my husband is a shrew and so is one of my four daughters... thankfully there's a level of familial sanity for me!
Good for you!!