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Have We Lost the Ability to Fall in Love?
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Have We Lost the Ability to Fall in Love?

Todd Hayen, PhD, RP's avatar
Todd Hayen, PhD, RP
Sep 25, 2023
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Have We Lost the Ability to Fall in Love?
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I really need everyone’s input on this one because it does scare me if it is true. And I am curious if my own anecdotal experience with this carries any weight. I see a lot of people in my practice, and a lot of them are young. I must say most of these young ones are young men, so maybe my observation is skewed, but the stories they relate to me makes me ask the question: have we lost the ability to fall in love?

I listen to their sad stories about encounters with the opposite sex, and how typically things fizzle out after a brief encounter. Usually sex is involved, much quicker than I feel is healthy, but that is the way of the times. It seems too as if they (mostly the young men I talk to) actually make effort to connect—they do nice gestures toward their “girl,” take them to nice places, treat them well—all the typical things you are supposed to do while “courting.” But then suddenly they get ghosted, or just dropped, or the most polite way of all but still hurtful, being told “it just isn’t working out.” I then usually ask the question, “well, were you in love with her?” The reply? “I don’t think so, I don’t even know what that is, what is it?”

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